Happy Holidays and Looking Back 2017

Looking Back 20172017…oh, what a year!! This year is sure one for the record books — from the personal to the political and everything in between! I’m pretty sure you’d agree with me too! There were ups and downs. Highs and lows. Happiness and heartbreak. Wonderful people came into my life while other people made an unexpected exit. Yes, 2017 wasn’t a year for the faint of heart, that’s for sure. But now that the year is almost over, I thought now would be the perfect time for a little happy holidays and looking back 2017 fun! You know I’m always up for some quality reflection, so without further ado, here’s a look back at the past year on So About What I Said…

Looking Back 2017I got deep in more Letters To My Future Husband, on second-guessing love and the man I don’t want Mr. Melissa Blake to be.

Looking Back 2017We chatted with some Love Lounge, on the games people play and any man of mine.

Looking Back 2017I got real and dropped some much-needed truth bombs in MEMO TO MEN, about such topics as how men are like the stock market, mystery vs. history and how it’s time to stop all that mansplaining.

Looking Back 2017Disability posts, including my shiny new wheelchair, a side of me you’ve never seen before, the saga of the shower chair and stigmas of mental illness.

Looking Back 2017Fashion features, like Style Guides, pretty opal rings, the allure of palm leaf purses and ’70s vintage tees.

Looking Back 2017Some beauty chat, including the blorange hair trend, summertime Chapstick collection and Christmas tree eyebrows.

Looking Back 2017Family fun posts, including Harry at the apple orchard, staycations, my birthday with the dinosaurs, Ms. Bear’s European adventure and County Fair shenanigans!

Looking Back 2017Pop culture musings, like an Ode to the Vampire Diaries, why the world still needs Buffy Summers, favorite emojis, as well as lots of TV and music talk.

Looking Back 2017***But the things I’m MOST PROUD of…?? My freelance writing career in 2017. It grew by leaps and bounds in the last 12 months, and I scored bylines in The New York Times, Glamour, Good Housekeeping (print!!), Racked, Ravishly, SheKnows, CNN and Country Living! And, I was featured in the amazing Pantsuit Nation book!! #ImStillWithHer

So, that’s where I am as we say goodbye to 2017 and get ready to usher in 2018. I’m not sure what the new year will bring, but I’m pretty confident that life can only go up from here. I am so thankful for you, dear readers, and this journey you’re on with me! The community that this blog has created has given me strength, lifted me up in my darkest hours and just generally brought a smile to my face each and every day. Thank you for being here and being so awesome!

Looking Back 2017Here’s hoping you’re all in the festive spirit and surrounded by the people you love most! We’ll be back to regular posting on January 3rd, so look for more of your favorites in 2018 — and, of course, never hesitate to let me know what you’d like to see by emailing me at mellow1422@aol.com!!! It’s going to be a fantastic year ahead, friends!!

And as always, feel free to connect with me on Pinterest, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and Bloglovin! See you there!! I love you, friends!! xoxo

Blog Anniversary: Nine Years Ago

Blog AnniversaryWow!! Wow!! Wow!! It’s hard to believe yet another year has come and gone, but here I am, celebrating So About What I Said’s blog anniversary!!

Nine years ago TODAY, I sat at our old Dell desktop computer and wrote the first post of this very blog. I was just 27. I didn’t really know what exactly I was doing, and I most definitely didn’t know what this blog would become over the years.

But now, after 5,847 posts and one full year of being self-hosted, I’m seeing what this blog has become and, well, it floors me EVERY SINGLE DAY.

I’ve been thinking all week of how I can properly mark this anniversary. All I kept thinking, though, is that this anniversary is sort of anticlimactic. I mean, compared to next year’s 10-year anniversary (a whole DECADE?!?), nine years just kind of…falls flat, you know?

And then I realized something: You can’t have an anniversary without going through the one before it. I can’t have a 10-year without a 9-year. So this year means something. It reflects all the stepping stones I’ve walked to get here — metaphorical stepping stones, of course! In a way, I suppose, it truly validates this journey I’ve been on all these years. You know me, I’m all about keeping it real.

Speaking of real, I wanted to take an appropriate pic for this post. Above all, it had to represent me, of course. Some people try to present a meticulously flawless, perfect version of themselves online — Instagrammers, I’m looking at you with your Starbucks selfies. Me? I have no trouble presenting the real me in the above photo, which perfectly captures my life as a freelance writer. In my case, that includes my classic yellow sweater, hair that’s a bit wild and, yes, I think that’s a piece of food on my shirt! #NoShame

This space and YOU, the amazing readers who keep coming back to read about my awkwardness and outspokenness, are the true treasures of my life. I love and appreciate you more than you’ll ever know. This year alone, I’ve had some very hurtful curves thrown my way. People have tried to tell me that I shouldn’t write about my life and have minimized my job as a writer. I wish I could say I didn’t let them get in my head, but they did. For far too long. But the people who really matter and mean the most to me lifted me up! They pulled me out of that dark place and helped me realize that THIS is what I’m meant to do — to tell my story honestly and openly. Thank you for letting me do this for NINE YEARS!!! Here’s to many more years of laughing and sharing!

I LOVE YOU ALL… xoxo

Deep Thoughts on Why I Write

Why I WriteAs I start working recently, I stumbled across the #WhyIWrite hashtag that was trending on Twitter a few weeks ago. I love that it was trending because it really got me thinking about my own writing. I could give a handful of reasons for why I write, like…

• It’s my job

• I want to share my story

• I want to help others

• I’m trying to make sense of the world

But really, it’s simple: I write because it’s WHO I AM. Honestly, I don’t know who I’d be without it. It’s enriched my life — and at times, even saved my life. This writing thing, I think it’s going to stick around for awhile. I’m pretty certain I’ve discovered my passion.

In the last month, my world has been turned upside down, and I’ve learned the hard way that some people simply don’t understand why I write about the personal and vulnerable aspects of my life. My heart was broken by their cruel and insensitive words, as if I’m somehow being selfish for telling my story openly and honestly.

But here’s where they’re wrong: I’m not just writing for me. I have an email folder where I save emails I get from people. Any time I start to question myself, I read those emails — words from complete strangers who could identify with my writing or who were help, even in a small way, by my words. This is why I do what I do. This is why I overshare and why I’ve come to love writing and blogging so much. For people to know they’re not alone. How can writing for that reason ever be a bad thing??

I’m forever certain of one thing: My writing. It’s part of my soul. This isn’t just some fun hobby for me. This is my career. I won’t ever be silenced or told what I can and can’t write. As I always say, “You can’t silence my pen” and that is so true! #WriterLife

And, as always, here’s a radical notion: If you don’t like something, don’t read it. Simple as that. That little x at the top right of your browser window is a beautiful thing!

So I suppose this is my impassioned plea to the world: PLEASE SUPPORT THE WRITERS IN YOUR LIFE! Ask them what they’ve been working on. Give them a high-five for their latest byline. Let them know their work is being seen and isn’t just disappearing in a black hole!

It’s not that hard and I promise that it’ll make them feel smile. I know this from experience!

Why I WriteWhy do you write, friends? What draws you to the page — err, I mean the keyboard? Do you feel like a weight has been lifted off your shoulder once you get it all out? Seriously, if you want to be inspired, check out that Twitter hashtag! It’s totally giving me life and endless inspiration right now!! xoxo

P.S. More on life as a blogger!

[Photos via We Heart It]

How Are You? Checking In and Sweet Words From Readers…

how are youWelcome back, friends!! How are you?? I hope you all had a splendid Memorial Day weekend and kicked off the unofficial beginning of summer in style. As we ease back into our routines (is that EVER an easy thing??), it occurred to me: You all are always so wonderful and listen to me prattle on endlessly about everything — even the most mundane things — and I am SO grateful for that! So I thought today would be the perfect time to ask YOU…

What’s going on in your corner of the world? What exciting things have you been up to lately?? I’d LOVE to hear all about your life, friends!!! Also, I’ve been getting lots of sweet emails ever since my Good Housekeeping essay came out! I’ve so enjoyed hearing from everyone and thought I’d share some of those sweet words from readers…

–“I have MS and am 20 years older than you, but I just read your article in Good Housekeeping! Great writer, funny as hell, and oh yeah disabled. I am so used to pity looks, disgusted looks, and so on…that I stopped looking at all. So excited to see a woman willing to bare her soul…”

–“I just read your story in June’s Good Housekeeping. You are quite an inspiration. Your story made me think of my own dad and how we supported each other through the bad times and how much we enjoyed the good times.”

–“I read your article in Good Housekeeping on “Father’s Day”. I must say your depiction of your father in your life brought me to tears. You are very lucky to have had such wonderful memories with a great man. Congratulations on your successes in life and overcoming the challenges you have faced with your disability.”

–“I came across your essay in Good Housekeeping this month and wanted to tell you how much I loved it. Your father sounds like an incredible man. I then of course headed over to your blog and spent an hour or so reading through it this morning, and I just had to write and tell you how much it inspired me. I really struggle with being open and vulnerable as a writer, and you do it incredibly well on all kinds of topics–love, relationships, depression, body image, fashion. I’d love to be half as open as you are on a tenth of the topics!”

–“I just wanted to let you know that I LOVED your writing piece in Good Housekeeping. The love you and your Dad shared reminded me of my relationship with my Dad. We are lucky women, aren’t we? It was very touching. You are a great writer! I just discovered your blog after reading your article and will start following. Keep up the great work!”

And, look at this!!! Another piece of excitement I JUST discovered when I logged on to So About What I Said this morning…

how are youWhaaat? Can you believe it? Almost nine years later and 5,700 posts — I guess this whole blogging thing is going to stick, huh?

Anyway, hope you all are having a marvelous Tuesday! I’ve got some fun posts planned for the rest of the week, so STAY TUNED… xoxo

[Top photo via We Heart It]

What Does It Mean to #DressLikeAWoman?

What does it mean to #DressLikeAWomanSo! I’ve been thinking A LOT about this hashtag lately. I went from confusion to utter disgust over who supposedly said it (and let’s be real here…he probably did say it!) to sadness to just plain frustration. And then, like I typically do, I did some hard thinking on this very question: What does it mean to #DressLikeAWoman?

For me, this is what it means to #DressLikeAWoman — a strong, independent, self-assured woman who knows her own mind and isn’t afraid to speak it. That’s me, above, in my old office when I was a college newspaper adviser, and I think it perfectly captures who I am. At my desk, which is now our kitchen table, I feel fierce and in charge — like I can conquer the world right from where I am. I look at that photo and I remember feeling like I was standing behind a podium instead of sitting behind a desk. I could do anything and I could be anything. I wasn’t bound by any rules or codes.

THAT is empowering, don’t you think? That’s what we should be teaching young women — we need to be showing them that what’s most important is who you are, not what you’re wearing. We need to be empowering women instead of dogmatically telling them that there is only one acceptable way for a woman to dress — both inside and outside of the workplace. I mean, our president may choose to live in the Stone Age. It doesn’t mean that we all have to.

I also spent some time scrolling through the #DressLikeAWoman hashtag on Twitter and I’m SO GLAD I did. The photos women posted of them in their natural elements were real, honest and such a powerful statement of who they are…

So, friends, what do you think it means to #DressLikeAWoman? Where do you feel most empowered and most like you? I’d certainly love to hear all about it, so tag a pic of yourself with the hashtag on Twitter and be sure to tag @melissablake so I see it!! #StrongWomen… xoxo