[Photos via hello ancolie]
I’ve marveled at plenty a pretty bauble over the years. So many beauties on Etsy that my eyes sometimes start spinning from all the glitz, glamour and glory! And of all the baubles I’ve blogged about, I’m still in mourning that this little number is no longer available; why, oh, why did I snatch it up when I had the chance?? But! All hope is not lost, thankfully! Just feast your eyes on this FANTASTIC gold garnet half eternity ring from ARDONN…
The garnet color reminds me of my red hair, so how cool would it be to color-coordinate the two?!? All I’d need to complete the look would be a red shirt and a red bracelet — perhaps of the carnelian kind??
Happy Sunday, friends!!!! We woke up to a blanket of snow here in the Midwest yesterday, so, accordingly, I’ve done absolutely nothing the entire weekend — well, except lose at Yahtzee!! I hope you enjoyed the two op-eds on the Gillette ad and the Women’s March that I posted this week! The news just moved too fast for me and I wasn’t able to pitch these pieces in time, but I’m glad they still got out in the world!! Here’s to a great weekend, and here are my favorite finds from the wonderful Web…
Umm, there’s a High School Musical TV show?
A new line of plush toys encourages children to talk about their feelings.
Isn’t it fun to think of what the Rugrats gang would be like as adults?
Why, YES, I would like these Oreos NOW.
So proud to finally see a gay couple on the cover of Parents magazine!
Plus, some great writing by women this week…
[Photo via Unsplash]
A few days ago, I was enjoying my after-dinner episode of The View, which has become one of my favorite nighttime rituals. But on this particular night, my heart sank as I watched the interview with Women’s March co-presidents Tamika Mallory and Bob Bland. By the time the interview was over, I was left with one thought: This is something I can no longer support.
The Women’s March has come under fire for being less than inclusive when it comes to disabilities, but both Mallory and Bland’s non-apology apology and refusal to condemn Nation of Islam leader Louis Farrakhan for his history of anti-Semitic and homophobic rhetoric is downright dangerous and beyond forgivable; Mallory even overtly praised the leader on Instagram recently, calling him the “Greatest of All Time.”
Despite push-back from The View co-hosts, neither woman from the Women’s March would say outright that they condemn.
“What I will say to you is that I don’t agree with many of Minister Farrakhan’s statements,” Mallory said.
This statement is, quite simply, not enough. Not agreeing with Farrakhan’s words is not the same as condemning him. It’s saying that, yes, you still support him, and this is complicity. You are who you surround yourself with and the Women’s March has no right to call itself an inclusive organization while simultaneously endorsing hate and bigotry.
With the third Women’s March set for this weekend, Mallory’s words are having some negative consequences. Both the DNC and Southern Poverty Law Center have cut ties and will not be a part of the march.
There’s no picking and choosing here. You can’t choose to embrace some parts of someone and cast aside other parts as if they don’t exist. And it’s incredibly toxic and reprehensible when the parts you ignore are actually harming people. We’ve fought so hard and come too far to settle for “Well, he’s said some very problematic things, but he’s helped people, so it’s all OK.”
No, no, no! It’s most definitely not OK. Because the minute we choose to look the other way, we’re setting a very dangerous and slippery precedent. What if, little by little, we keep extending the boundaries of what is acceptable and what we’re willing to overlook? How far are we willing to go until we stop and say “Hold on! This is not right!”
My hope is that the Women’s March gets itself back on track and finds its way. It hurts my heart that something meant to be a beacon of hope, meant to uplift women, meant to be a powerful statement of resistance, could become so damaging to the very people it’s supposed to be championing.
I really love the way my writer friend Dorri, who has attended the Women’s March in the past, explained it…
“It’s like people saying, ‘I don’t like immigrant children being separated from their parents’ and then vote for the Republicans who are making that happen. You cannot separate Farrakhan from anti-Semitism.
I was so happy at the Women’s March. I felt like we were fighting to right the wrongs. I thought of Gloria Steinem and MLK and all of the people throughout history who have fought hard for change. But it’s so crushing that one of the Women’s March founders doesn’t see that it is despicable to be friends with an anti-Semite. It’s just more hate. I thought the Women’s March was full of good people — and it was. But I cannot align myself with them anymore because of this issue. I cannot say, ‘Well, I don’t like Anti-Semitism, but I like the Women’s March.’ Just doesn’t work for me.”
Sometimes, it’s your silence that speaks the loudest. And what the women of the Women’s March don’t say tells me all I need to know. Because in the end, aligning yourself with him IS endorsing his hate. There is absolutely no way to separate the two. That sets us all back. That makes us all lose. And that is incredibly sad and disappointing…
[Top photo by Bryan Woolston for Reuters; Illustration via Join the Uproar]
Ooooh, it’s time to do some praising, friends!!! Have you seen this wonderful ad?? The famed razor brand Gillette asks men to challenge toxic masculinity and let me just say. It’s. About. Time. Because. We. Desperately. Need. It.
The video, which went live yesterday, sees the company put a socially conscious spin on its classic tagline (“The best a man can get“) by asking, “Is this the best a man can get?” It also shows a montage of various situations as examples of how men can have a positive impact instead of contributing to this dangerous culture of toxic masculinity. There are scenes about catcalling, scenes about mansplaining, scenes about aggression and — my favorite — a scene at the end that showed a father holding his young daughter and teaching her positive affirmations about herself.
In less than two minutes, Gillette was able to make a powerful statement and showed the world something so many of us have been saying for awhile: Men need to step up. Men need to DO BETTER.
Sadly, the video received its share of criticism, mostly from (surprise, surprise) MRA types who see any sort of call to action as a gut-punch condemnation. That is, they see it as a brutal attack that’s just not fair!
Here’s how the conversation usually goes when men are called out for their bad behavior…
Men: Women are overly emotional and triggered by every little thing!
Also men: Arghhhh, that Gillette ad is horrible!! It’s not fair!
Seriously, men, if you feel so threatened and enraged by an ad asking you to simply be a decent human being, maybe you’re the problem. Maybe it’s time you look in the mirror and ask yourself “What can I do to make my space better? How can I be part of the solution?”
We’re not asking men to move mountains. We’re not asking men to cure cancer. Heck, we’re not even asking men to bring about world peace. We’re merely asking you to commit to common decency and pledge to help more than harm. Men shouldn’t respond by getting angry. They should respond by joining women (and other men) who have been fighting the good fight for generations.
After all, that’s not asking too much, is it? The video ends with these thought-provoking words: “Because the boys watching today will be the men of tomorrow.”
Indeed, the next generation is watching, modeling, absorbing all these messages about what it means to “be a man.” Don’t we want to show them all the good things men can be?? Let’s get started, OK…?? At the very least, men out there, you can start with “I’m sorry…“