Let the Fourth of July Be a Reminder — and a Reckoning

Fourth of JulyWell, here we are, friends. Another Fourth of July. Can you sense my very, very low level of enthusiasm?? It practically doesn’t even register on the Enthusiasm Scale because, honestly, I’m not feeling in the “American spirit” at all. I’m sure many of you share my thoughts…

It’s no secret that I’ve been feeling, umm, a bit jaded. And this isn’t the first year I’ve felt this way either. You might remember the op-ed I wrote last year for The Independent, in which I coined one of my catchphrases.

“Lady Liberty is weeping,” I wrote.

But if the last six months alone have showed us anything, it’s that Lady Liberty isn’t the only one weeping. Nor should she be. I can’t help but think that along with the grand Statue, the tears are flowing…

The Founding Fathers are weeping

The Constitution is weeping

The American flag is weeping

We all should be weeping

So the last six months? That’s all of 2020 — hasn’t exactly been a banner year, has it? All of us should be weeping at the state of this country. From nearly 130K deaths from COVID to the repeated unjust killing of the Black community to the constant maligning of peaceful protesters, America is in chaos.

And speaking of protesters, I find it incredibly rich that so many have seemingly forgotten this tenet of our democracy. To see people chastise and deride those who engage in their First Amendment right to peaceful protest is some next-level hypocrisy and, frankly, it’s chilling. Downright bone-chilling. Y’all obviously weren’t paying attention in history class and it shows! Bigly!

Maybe you’ve forgotten a little thing known as the Revolutionary War?? You know, that series of events that won us our freedom and independence from British tyranny?

Spoiler alert: The Founding Fathers protested during the Revolution. Yes, the Founding Fathers were also protesters (see the Boston Tea Party, for example…), but we don’t also call them rioters and looters and thugs. I wonder if their skin color has something to do with that?

Fourth of JulyThe truth is, we wouldn’t have an Independence Day at all if it hadn’t been for protesters, so to those that say protesting is un-American, I say this: Protesting is about the most patriotic thing you can do. It’s literally how this country was founded. It’s been the bedrock of our democracy since 1776 — that’s 244 years!!

It’s kind of our thing. Or at least, it should be, even though it doesn’t feel like it lately. A quick perusal of the daily headlines and you’ll see that the ideals of the flag have not held up for everyone. So if you really want to show your sense of pride and patriotism this year, please, do it in a way that truly honors America’s origin story. That starts with one simple thing. It’s so easy, but apparently, the majority of the country needs reminding, so allow me…

WEAR YOUR DAMN MASK.

The Founding Fathers didn’t risk their lives so you could live it up on the Fourth of July all reckless and irresponsible and inconsiderate. The Founding Fathers didn’t risk their lives for freedom just so you could risk someone’s life in the name of your freedom. Again, wear your damn mask!

When we went to NYC last summer, the only souvenir I wanted was a Statue of Liberty figure. Not because I’m proud of where we are as a country right now (I’m not, clearly!), but because I wanted a constant reminder of what we should strive for. Let’s remember that Lady Liberty is worth fighting for. Our democracy is worth fighting for.

Fourth of JulyI’m taking my summer break next week — don’t worry, I’m not even going to leave my house! I’ll be celebrating the Fourth of July and my vacation by binge-watching The Baby-Sitters Club reboot.

I’ll be back to regular posting on Monday, July 20th and I’m sure I’ll have plenty of stories to share. Hope you have some sunny summer days ahead, friends!! Safely and responsibly masked, of course… xoxo

[First photo via Unsplash]

Family Photos: Our Christmas Adventure…at Home

Christmas ChristmasHello, friends, and welcome back!! How was your holiday?? I can’t believe that this is my first post of 2020, but I’m excited to be back! Although, it is pretty tough to get back in the swing of the work routine, isn’t it? I mean, today is the first time I’ve been out of the house in TWO WEEKS, so you can probably imagine how I’m doing right now. The shock! The sights! The sounds! When did the world get so bright?? It’s certainly a lot to take in and it has me thinking about our grand Christmas adventure — at home, of course! Because, really, that’s the best place to be for the holidays, if you ask me!

I thought I’d share some of those photos today! Think good family, fun games and delicious food (spoiler alert: A huge pizza is involved!)…

ChristmasWe kicked off the festive season with a family get-together! And when you have a family party and order a pizza called The Hurricane…you quickly realize that a photo can’t possibly capture said pizza’s size! Talk about huge!! And delicious!!

Christmas ChristmasThis year, it finally hit me: We’ve started a new family tradition! Every year, usually a few days before Christmas, I get my hair cut because, you know, you got to look fresh and fabulous for the Big Day! We then meet for lunch (this year, we went to a great Mexican restaurant AND we got Janelle to be in the photo!) and afterward, I, umm, do my Christmas shopping. I know. I’m that person.

And, yes, I’m also that person who doesn’t wrap her presents until the evening of Christmas Eve. Picture this: It’s almost 7 p.m. and there is a mountain of gifts and wrapping paper all over my bed. I’m furiously cutting, wrapping, taping (repeat!) as my mom shouts “Your dinner is getting cold; do you want to get food poisoning?” over and over. Suffice it to say, I got all my presents wrapped — and narrowly escaped a bout of food poisoning!

Speaking of food, we usually have a huge breakfast on Christmas morning and this year was quite possibly the most scrumptious, most delicious, most EVERYTHING I’ve ever had. My cousin Mona sent us a pancake gift set with pancake mix and syrup made in Vermont. Friends, you’ve never lived until you’ve taste the sweet taste of syrup from Vermont. It’s a transcendent experience like no other!

ChristmasLook what I got for my mom! I dare you to look at this photo and not immediately declare me the Best Gift Giver of all time!! Go ahead. I give myself 5/5 saxophones!

ChristmasHow cool is the theme in my mom’s gifts to me?? WOMEN RULE — and rule the world, right?? Well, we’re still working on the latter, but I know we’ll get there someday!

Christmas ChristmasStella and Whitney are usually notorious frenemies. But, they cuddled together and sat under the tree together!! It’s a Christmas miracle!!

ChristmasAlso, Whitney on Christmas morning is exactly how I’ve felt for much of 2019 — watching what’s happening and giving the world so much side-eye…

It may have been 55 degrees outside on Christmas Day, but I still had a “Frozen” Christmas!! What wonderful gifts from my mom and sister!!

After having a leisurely morning, we went to the movies! I never thought I’d be snapping a selfie with my movie popcorn, but here we are…

Anyway, we saw Little Women! Have you seen it?? I’ll be doing a separate blog post on the film next week, but in the meantime, here’s my capsule review: I knew I’d like Little Women, but I’m here to tell y’all that I LOVED IT. Jo March is everything!! She’s fierce and tough and completely unapologetic about it all. Such a relevant character to women’s lives in 2019…

A+
10/10
ALL THE THINGS

We had such a fun afternoon decorating cookies with friends!!! Big thanks to my mom for making her famous almond cookies!! The recipe was passed down from my grandmother and these cookies remind me of all things family and love.

Plus, did I mention that they’re delicious?!? So. Good.

And, of course, it wouldn’t be Christmas in 2019 without a festive holiday photo filter…or two!! As usual, Snapchat was on its game with the filters this year, so I couldn’t help but capture the magic!

I hope everyone had an equally magical holiday and New Year!! Speaking of New Year, look for a post tomorrow about my mantra for 2020. And let me know how you spent your holiday!! I want to hear about it all, so be sure to leave a comment with all your stories!! xoxo

That Was a Time: My 2019 Year-In-Review

2019 Year-In-ReviewHappy Holidays, friends!!! You know how I’m always saying “that was a time“?? Yes, sometimes I say it just to be overly dramatic because, let’s face it, I’ve been known to be a bit extra about things — can you blame me? But when I say (errr, write!), that phrase in the context of my ever-so-official and exciting 2019 Year-In-Review???

Well, that’s the absolute truth with a capital T — no filter, no pretense, no hyperbole. Just honest truth about a year that was certainly one for the record books. Was your year like that too? I sometimes dread looking back at the year every December and sometimes, the whole ordeal can start to feel a bit cringe-worthy with cliche phrases and all that looking-back banter. I still like to do it, though, because just going through the motion of reminiscing about one year is a great way to prepare for the upcoming year; it helps to put things in perspective and you all know how much I love putting things in perspective and analyzing until my heart’s content.

And like I said, 2019 was quite the year to remember, so I’m pretty sure that this 2019 Year-In-Review is going to be quite something as well.

In fact, there’s SO MUCH to remember that I’ve been worried that I’ll forget to include important and memorable moments — my apologies if I do, so feel free to remind me in the comments!! Like I said last year, BUCKLE UP, friends, because this is going to be epic, if you ask me! So without further ado, here are the highlights of my life online and offline for the last 12 months. Let’s get to this 2019 Year-In-Review…

2019 Year-In-ReviewI blogged about all things love and relationships, like Ms. Bear and the Fake Plant, surviving the Polar Vortex, an ode to Conversation Hearts, entitled Dude Bros on The Bachelorette and more thoughts on my father’s suicide.

2019 Year-In-ReviewDisability posts, such as ways to support disabled people, why I love talking about my disability, Mr. Rogers, the importance of disability representation and my date with the DMV.

2019 Year-In-ReviewFantastic fashion moments, like Harry Styles at the Met Gala, this pink opal ring, unicorn love and more Etsy finds!

2019 Year-In-ReviewFun Family Photos, including our big trip to the Big County Fair, our Christmas Trees, my 38th birthday, the Polar Vortex and our TRIP TO NYC.

2019 Year-In-Review(As a side note, I just have to say, again, HOW FUN our trip to the Big Apple was!! Central Park!! Broadway!! The View!! Meeting my amazing editors!! Tons of family time!! I still can’t believe we got to go and I’m so grateful to my mom and cousin for making it happen!! They’re aces, aren’t they??)

2019 Year-In-ReviewPontificating on pop culture, like Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga, the adorable Royal Baby, The Big Bang Theory finale (spoiler alert: I wasn’t a fan!), Shawn Mendes and Camila Cabello, how I’m a huge Shawn Mendes fan girl, Sharpay Evans and High School Musical, Taylor Swift and how 1999 was really the best year in pop culture!

2019 Year-In-ReviewAnd, just like in 2018, I wrote lots of social and political commentary posts because now is not the time to be silent: The culture of women apologizing, challenging toxic masculinity, why I didn’t support the Women’s March, Nick Sandmann and dangerous teens, Joe Biden and consent, women sharing successes and the Alabama abortion ban and women’s body autonomy.

Plus, I also gave my VERY FIRST speech at a political event! Oh, wow, I was so nervous, but I think it went well. And it really pumped me up!

Aside from blogging, my freelance writing career continued to grow in 2019, as you can see from this cute photo spread I made!! I wrote about my favorite (and not-so-favorite) things in the areas of relationships, disabilities and pop culture for publications like Cosmo, Glamour, The Fix and The Week and The Washington Post. Plus, my op-ed game was strong — I wrote 10 pieces for CNN Opinion!

I also broke into new publications such as The Independent, Adweek, The Daily Dot, Family Minded, Rooted In Rights, Health, HuffPost Personal, Local Love and The Riveter!

Now, I saved the best for last!! The biggest, most surprising, most unexpected, most surreal, most exciting and most thrilling thing to happen…

MY TWEET WENT VIRAL.

Can you believe it?? I still can’t, honestly! I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately and it’s funny because that viral tweet is something I never worked for and something that I didn’t plan. I plan and plot every single aspect of my blog and freelance writing, but this viral tweet came out of nowhere! Needless to say, I’m still processing it all. But I’m so grateful that people responded to it! I just hope I didn’t sound too awkward in my interviews with USA Today, Good Morning America, The BBC, The Chicago Tribune and PEOPLE — not to mention the handful of live interviews I did. Oh, man, that was a time, indeed!

Whew! Whew! Whew!

Still with me, friends??

Good. Because seeing my entire year all written out like this is just a bit overwhelming!! I mean, when we’re living it and going through the year, we don’t really think about how massive it all will seem at the end, do we? We live each day and take it one step at a time. We focus on one thing at a time. The next item on our to-do list. And the next item after that. Until, well, it all adds up to 365 days of memories — good ones, bad ones, memorable ones and even ones we’d like to forget.

But then comes that moment in late December when you take everything as one big collective whole. You look at everything that happened throughout the past year and you realize, maybe for the very first time, “Wow! I did all that, didn’t I…?”

Whether it was good or bad, you survived the year! And that is something to be proud of! And, of course, something to celebrate!!

My idea of the perfect celebration? Taking some much-needed time off for the holidays!! I’m excited to kick back, relax and spend quality time with my mom and Janelle. The holidays can be hard and emotional for so many reasons. If you’re struggling this year, please know that you’re not alone. Be kind to yourself…you deserve it!

I hope you’re able to get in the festive spirit in whatever way brings you joy and peace!! I’ll be back to regular posting on Wednesday, January 8th!! Look for posts about our Christmas adventures, some new bylines and odes to one of my favorite shows of 2019 and…Peppermint Patty! Yes, the blog fun will continue in 2020. Also, feel free to send me your thoughts and ideas any time — just email me at mellow1422@aol.com!!! I always love hearing from you!! And I hope you enjoyed this 2019 year-in-review!

And as always, feel free to connect with me on Pinterest, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and Bloglovin! See you there!!

I love you, friends!! And I’m so glad I got to meet so many new friends this year who found my blog after my viral tweet. Thanks for stopping by and I hope you’ll continue on this journey with me in the new year!! I’d love to see your own 2019 Year-In-Review too! xoxo

Family Photos: Oh, Christmas Trees! Oh, Christmas Trees!

Christmas Trees Christmas TreesYes, friends!! I did write Christmas trees in the title of this blog post! And it’s a true statement — we’ve got multiple trees around our house this year — more than usual, in fact!!

But, really, who am I to complain here? I love being the photographer every year when we decorate the Christmas tree!!! How cute is my mom?!? We put our trees up over Thanksgiving weekend. I thought we’d be content with just two small trees — one in the kitchen and then one in my mom’s room. And then, just like that, my mom bought another Christmas tree!! That Santa tree skirt, below, belonged to my grandparents and reminds me of my childhood holidays spent in Alabama with them!!

Christmas TreesIf you’re overwhelmed by those HUGE trees, I highly recommend a smaller tabletop tree! It’s just as beautiful and it makes the kitchen feel all kinds of cozy!!

Now this is what I call getting lit on a Saturday night, y’all

Also, a few words about the holidays…

A winter’s day
In a deep and dark December

I’ve always loved “I Am a Rock” by Simon & Garfunkel and find myself singing it a lot during this time of year.

And even though I’m generally an upbeat person, this has been my theme song for years. I’ve built walls. I’m sometimes afraid of getting close to people. I’ve used my writing as an armor of protection. I’ve felt like a rock and an island.

Holidays always have a way of making me think about the past. Last week during Thanksgiving, I got to thinking about how fall is such a hard season for me. My dad was diagnosed with cancer in the fall. And it was around Thanksgiving in 2010 that my severe depression took hold. I just remember watching the Macy’s Parade, something that was so full of fun and happiness, and I just couldn’t stop crying. A month later, I was hospitalized and it was so much scarier than any surgery I’ve ever had.

So I always get a little nervous this time of year about that depression coming back. Because it felt so all-encompassing, like it swallowed me entirely. Because I felt like I lost myself for a good 6 months. Because I worried every day that I’d never be Melissa again. Maybe I’ll worry every fall for the foreseeable future, but something I’ll never feel is shame. Depression is a physical illness and if you’re struggling, please never feel shame, OK??

Christmas TreesBut let’s end this post on a high note, shall we?? Too early for that classic “Naughty or Nice” Christmas tableau?? I’ll let you decide who’s who…

And I’d love to know, friends: Do you have multiple Christmas trees in your home? Or one huge one? Any other fun holiday tradition you’re looking forward to this season?? xoxo

Thanksgiving 2019: What Are You Most Grateful For This Year??

Thanksgiving 2019 Thanksgiving 2019Happy Thanksgiving 2019, friends!! I know Thanksgiving is actually still a couple days away, but I wanted to take some time to ask you a very important question: What are you most grateful for in 2019…??

As you can probably tell from those two pictures above, I’m SO INCREDIBLY THANKFUL for my mom and sister! That’s been the case every other year, too, but this year??? It seems especially salient. It’s no secret that I’m pretty frustrated with the state of the world — heck, I’d even go so far as to say that I’m downright angry. Things are a complete mess and it’s so easy to lose hope. I’ve found myself losing hope multiple times this year; I’ll probably lose hope again before 2019 is even over too — I mean, we’ve still got a little over a month left to go in this year. I’m constantly saying, “Now I’ve seen it all,” only to realize that, no, things can — and do — get very, very worse.

The truth is, there’s so much to get upset about, but that’s not what this post is about. I don’t want that to be what this post is about. At least not for today. We can have one day where we don’t dwell on all the bad things that are going on around us. We can have one day where we just enjoy good food and the company of our loved ones (sans politics talk, right?). We can have one day where we…just be.

Perhaps that’s the beauty of Thanksgiving and why I’m so looking forward to some downtime this week. We’ve earned it and we deserve it.

I don’t know who needs to hear this right now, but I see you. I know the holidays are hard for so many people, myself included. Some don’t have families to go home to and others struggle with tense relationships, so please be gentle with yourself. Like I said, you’ve earned it and you deserve it.

Thanksgiving 2019So here’s to a restful and relaxing Thanksgiving 2019. I hope you celebrate in ways that bring you the most joy and love. I’ll be taking the rest of the week off, but I’m looking forward to coming back next week with exciting new posts, including this year’s Holiday Gift Guide!!! Any suggestions for categories?? Feel free to let me know! And follow along on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram since I’ll surely be chronicling my adventures there!

And I’d love to hear about YOUR Thanksgiving adventures, friends! Where are you headed? What delicious food are you craving? Any fun traditions in store? Have a great rest of the week!!! xoxo

[Bottom photo via Unsplash]