šŸ» Ms. Bear Remembers the Love (and Some Lessons) on Her 40th Wedding Anniversary šŸ’“

Wedding AnniversaryForty years??? Yesterday would have been Brian’s and my 40th wedding anniversary. Wow, that seems like a long time. We only made it to 24, almost 25. Each year on my anniversary, I let myself think for a few minutes about how we would be celebrating if he was still here. Brian loved to give the schmaltzy cards, flowers and candy. He was every womanā€™s dream date, and believe me, I know how lucky I was to have him. I think he felt the same way because after he died, I found every card I ever gave him!

So, yesterday I wondered how I would react to this milestone anniversary, especially since I was helping out at church with a celebration for three couples who were hitting their 45th wedding anniversary this year. I worried I would feel sad. But, you know what?? I was so happy to help them celebrate. I even made little bags of candy to represent the years of marriage. Hereā€™s the little poem that went along with them…

Skittles are for the sunshiny times youā€™ve had
Carmels for those rather sticky times
Dark chocolate for the dark and sometimes bitter times
And Laffy Taffy for all the shared laughs over the years

Marriage is really a hodge-podge of feelings and emotions as you go through life together. If youā€™re lucky, the happy times greatly outweigh the bad times! But, as my mother cautioned me before I got married, ā€œThere will be happy times and not-so-happy times and there will be times you will be flush with money and times you wonā€™t have enough.ā€ Oh, the wisdom of our mothers!

But, to carry on with my day: I learned a big lesson this year. First, I’ll tell you about my afternoon and then I will tell you the lesson (oh, the suspense!). After lunch (Melissa bought me Jersey Mikeā€™s subs, which were excellent, as always), Janelle and I went to the store to buy some supplies for a friend of mine who was ill. We went around the store picking out things we thought would be good and then we delivered them.

Wedding AnniversarySo, hereā€™s the lesson I learned…when you get too caught up in your emotions, it really helps to do something for someone else! That outing to the store gave me a purpose outside of thinking about how Brian is not here to celebrate with me. Iā€™m going to remember this lesson for the next time I may need it!

There were two other fun things from yesterday that I want to remember. First, Janelle made me a cake that she called the ā€œlove cake.” It was truly a piece of art! Then, when we ate the cake, Melissa surprised me by buying me the first season of Bewitched on Amazon Prime. Sometimes we all need a little magic in our day!

Family Photos: Our First Summer Walk…and Lunch Outside

Summer WalkBreaking news: We had quite a busy day on Monday! Well, more like a busy afternoon since I technically didn’t get up until 10:45…ooops! In my defense, though, I’ve slept much, much later — just ask my mom! Anyway, I recently suggested that we take our first official summer walk because, ummm, I don’t get out much in the cold winter months and I’ve become paler than a vampire; seriously, if I looked in the mirror, I don’t think I’d even have a reflection! So anyway, take that summer walk we did. And, wow, did it prove to be just the thing we needed too. I’m starting to think the warm sun is a giant ball of pure magic!

Summer WalkI couldn’t resist snapping this photo of my mom right after we started our trek. She’s one of those people who likes to walk ahead and lead the pack. I think it comes from all her years as a teacher spent corralling hoards of unruly students on field trips. This photo is her classic pose. When she saw me taking her photo, she said, “What are you doing?” as if she not photogenic — is she humble or what?

Summer WalkWe’ve walked the above path a lot, but for some reason on Monday, I was struck by how much it reminds me of life. Life can feel like one giant winding path sometimes and it can start to feel like we’re just walking on it forever, but there really is beauty all around it, you know?

Summer WalkWe were going to just walk up to the gas station to get a soda pop, but as we were walking on a merry way, we realized that it was almost noon. Why not stop for a nice lunch, we thought? We have the greatest restaurant right by our house — it’s a tavern/sports bar, and they have the largest order of fries I’ve ever seen! SO YUGE! My mom and I split an order and we still had some leftover. That’s saying A LOT considering I could eat all the fries in sight if I really wanted to…with extra ranch for dipping, of course!

Summer WalkSeriously, though, it was so nice to just sit outside, eat lunch and shoot the breeze with my mom — and feel the summer breeze! I’m usually not one for eating al fresco because of a very, very unfortunate incident on our Arizona vacation involving me, the desert sun and one too many garlic potatoes. But in the Midwest, the conditions just seem to be right! Whew!

Summer WalkWe came home, played a game of Yahtzee and then…that’s when I noticed it! My arm. A growing patch of RED. Ahh, I knew exactly what was brewing under my pasty-pale skin. A sunburn! I knew I should have invested in a sunhat this year!!

Summer WalkOh, well, at least there was some good news that came with said sunburn — I’ve never drank so much water in my entire life! I didn’t suffer from dehydration, that’s for sure, which, if you know my history, can happen at the drop of a hat! But it was all aces, so crisis averted!!

And, finally, we’re nothing if not creatures of habit: We realized that we went out for lunch at this exact same restaurant almost exactly one year ago. Right before we bought my new shower chair! So, yeah for random anniversaries, right?!?!?

What have you been doing to welcome the summer and its glorious weather, friends?? Been eating outside? Going for a summer walk at dusk? I’d love to hear all about it!!! xoxo

Have a Relaxing Memorial Day Weekend

Memorial Day WeekendCan you feel the glorious change in the air, friends?!? It’s…wait for it… MEMORIAL DAY WEEKEND!!! Or, as I like to call it, the Official Kick-Off to Summer!! Because as we all know, there is nothing better than summer!!

I’ve been sick this week with some strange dizzy-flu illness, so I’m taking the day off today and enjoying a four-day weekend!! I’m sure I’ll be sharing my adventures on Twitter and Instagram (read: A Target shopping trip today! Score!), so be sure to follow along if you’d like!

Have I also mentioned the sheer number of blog post ideas I’ve been coming up with lately?? I’ve been saving them as drafts and I’m thinking June is going to be a VERY exciting month on So About What I Said. Look for posts about our new cat, an ode to a favorite restaurant, new CNN op-eds and…myself as an illustration!!

Indeed, fun times are ahead, friends! Thanks for being super patient with me this week, and don’t forget to raise an ice-cold soda for me over the Memorial Day Weekend!!! Hope it’s a relaxing one for you too!!!

P.S. Don’t forget to enter the Spring Print Giveaway if you haven’t already! Such a gorgeous print and quote, don’t you think, friends?

An Ode to Flower Crown Photo Filters

Flower CrownNormally, this would be the time of year that I’m rocking the fabulous polo shirt look. You remember all my past looks, don’t you? I’d ham it up for the camera in my colorful polo shirts as I welcomed the spring season. Well, this year, I’m excited to share something else that has swiftly caught my attention. BEHOLD, it’s Flower Crown Filters season!!

Yes, pretty flower graphics have replaced my love of polo shirts! I know, I know. Now, I know this news might come as quite a shock to you, but I assure you that this is definitely something to be EXCITED about! Just think about it. Polo shirts will only take you so far, with their limited color options and their sometimes-heavy fabric. But flower crown filters? Those little things just swing the doors wide open on a whole new array of possibilities — from vibrant to subdued colors to the specific types of flowers featured.

In other words, it’s like adorning your head with magic. A very magical superpower that you can beam out into the world. We could all use a new superpower every now and then, don’t you think? It just adds a little more oomph to our step — or, a little more oomph to my roll, in my case! And, really, it just brightens the day and makes me smile, so you know that you can never go wrong with that.

Flower CrownAs you can see from these photos (the second one isn’t specifically a flower, but I thought it was pretty nonetheless!), this is going to be a very colorful spring and summer for me, and I couldn’t be more excited. I’ve also been meaning to write a proper blog post on my newfound obsession with Snapchat, so be looking for that coming soon!

Do you have a favorite flower crown filter, friends? Or maybe a favorite photo filter app? I’d love to find more flower-y options!! Here’s to flower crown filter fun!! xoxo

(Please note: This is NOT a sponsored post. I just really, really like flower crowns, obviously!)

On Martin Crane, Grief and TV Characters

Martin CraneWhen I heard that John Mahoney died in February, I was completely heartbroken. It felt like I’d just lost someone close to me. In a way, I did “know” Mahoney — or, at least, the beloved dad he played on Frasier for 11 years. Because in some very-important ways, Mahoney’s Martin Crane reminded me of my own father and helped me through my own grief journey.

Frasier quite possibly saved my family’s life. My mom and I watched it obsessively following my father’s death, and it got us through some of our darkest days. Martin Crane brought us so much laughter, joy and life lessons. He always seemed to know exactly what to say when Frasier and Niles would get themselves worked up into tizzies (usually over nothing important, as I’m prone to do too!), and Martin would also set them straight when they’d say the wrong thing or put their foot in their mouth — for what seemed like the billionth time.

But what I really and truly loved about Martin? The fact that he knew what was important in life. He knew how to have fun and not take everything so seriously, you know? It’s almost like he was keenly aware that life was incredibly finite and he wasn’t going to waste any second of it. That’s sort of how my dad was. Maybe he knew our life together would be short, so he was all about family in everything he did. He loved spending time with us, even if we were just hanging out at home on a random Tuesday night trying to figure out my chemistry homework.

Then last week, we found ourselves watching episodes of Frasier once again. We were grieving our beloved Harry and needed lots of comfort. Like so many years ago, we found it in Martin and his sons. True, we could recite practically every line from memory, but in a way, that only added to our comfort level.

Yes, I know John Mahoney isn’t really Martin Crane, but during the time I needed him most, he was. He embodied the character so fully and completely, and I’m forever grateful for that.

How is it that we become so attached to TV characters? How is it that they become part of our lives, that their story becomes our story? And their story, ultimately, helps us heal. It’s such a powerful thing, isn’t it, friends? Thank you, Martin Crane. For everything… xoxo