My Essay on HelloGiggles: “Are We Destined to Turn Into Our Mothers?”

Are We Destined to Turn Into Our MothersI’m not sure if it’s because of my age or just the natural passage of time, but I’ve had one central question rolling around in my head for the last several months: Are we destined to turn into our mothers? And even more specifically…is turning into our mothers really such a bad thing in the end?

So you can pretty much imagine my sheer excitement when I got to write about this very topic for HelloGiggles last week! My essay “Are We Destined to Turn Into Our Mothers?” is my third piece for the site and I’m incredibly happy with the way it turned out. Full disclosure: I didn’t let my mom read it before it was published, but luckily, she enjoyed the finished product, too!

Here’s an excerpt of the essay, and I hope it makes you think about the relationship you have with your own mother…

So why, then, have I felt like I see her every time I look in the mirror? Lately, her words have been coming out of my mouth.

It’s such a natural thing that it’s even shocking at times. I’ll spontaneously start talking out loud when I get frustrated with my computer. I’ll make a point of ordering my burger well done because you can never be too careful with prepared meats.

But I’ve heard stories from friends and have seen enough Lifetime movies to know that, as my grandparents used to say, “the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.” Sometimes, like in my case, it falls from that tree and surprises you by just how hard it smacks you right on the top of your head. That moment when we become a walking, talking mini-me of our mothers — well, it’s not exactly a moment we can plan for, can we? It happens, it takes us by surprise and all we can really do is try to integrate it into the adult we’ve become.

You can read the full essay here and I’d love to hear your thoughts. Feel free to email me anytime at mellow1422@aol.com and let’s chat! And of course, feel free to share my essay on Facebook, Twitter or even your local refrigerator. If you share on Twitter, be sure to tag me @melissablake so we can connect! I can’t wait to hear from you! Love you all… xoxo

My Essay on HelloGiggles: “How a Recurring Dream Helped Me Overcome Impostor Syndrome”

recurring dreams impostor syndrome hellogigglesWe’ve talked about recurring dreams a few times on the blog and I’ve been plagued with some dozy dream reruns in my day — some involving hospitals and others involving my father. Pretty heavy stuff, huh? Why can’t I ever dream about gentlemen-ly pool boys over and over? That would be the stuff dreams are made of…

But I digress. I had one dream in particular, though, that started playing itself on a never-ending loop. It was the same scenario, with the same feelings, with the same, “what-the-heck-is-going-on?” vibe even after I’d wake up. And it wasn’t until I actually sat down and wrote about it — all of it — that I finally started putting the crazy puzzle pieces together. I finally saw the whole picture for what it was…

Impostor Syndrome.

Even better? The essay How a Recurring Dream Helped Me Overcome Impostor Syndrome was published on HelloGiggles today! It details the recurring dream I had about finding out that I technically never had enough credits to graduate college — yikes! If I wanted to get my degree, I’d have to go back and finish. ASAP. Looking back now, it’s obvious what the dream was all about, but at the time, everything was just one big ball of confusion.

Here’s an excerpt of the essay, and something tells me I’m not alone in my dream dilemmas…

I hated to admit it, but maybe I was suffering from a case of Impostor Syndrome, that phenomenon that fills our heads with all kinds of anxiety and doubts about our abilities.

The insecurities grow increasingly palpable until we’re questioning our very worth.

The more I thought about it, the more I couldn’t deny that my insecurities were getting the best of me. I felt like a complete fraud as I saw other writers getting published in the same magazines I’d been trying to break into for years; they made it look so easy. What was I doing wrong? Maybe I really didn’t have any idea what I was doing — but the scarier thought? Maybe I didn’t have what it takes to be a writer.

Our minds have a strange way of showing us the light during the darkest hours of the night. It’ll show us things we can’t see in the morning, and, maybe more importantly, it’ll show us those deep fears that we can’t admit — both to other people and to ourselves.

You can read the full essay here and I’d love to hear your thoughts. Feel free to email me anytime at mellow1422@aol.com and let’s chat! And of course, feel free to share my essay on Facebook, Twitter or even your local refrigerator. If you share on Twitter, be sure to tag me @melissablake so we can connect! I can’t wait to hear from you! Love you all… xoxo

Update Your Bookmarks! So About What I Said Is Back!

Hi…hey…howdy…hello!!

It’s been pretty quiet around these parts for the last few weeks, friends!! Aside from writing two election posts last week, you haven’t heard much from Yours Truly.

Until now!

If you follow me on Twitter, you might have seen my enthusiastically exciting tweets over the weekend. I got myself all in a tizzy because I knew today was going to be a VERY special day. It’s a day I’ve been talking about for awhile. It’s a day I sometimes thought would never come. It’s a day that is sure to go down in history — well, in my mind, anyway…

So About What I Said has a new home with its very own domain!! It’s official new home is melissablakeblog.com…

Yes, that’s right — let the celebration begin, let the church bells rings from every village in the land, let balloons and confetti line all the streets of the world!!

Can you tell I’m pretty stoked, friends?? In honor of this most glorious of days, I thought it only appropriate to celebrate with a big blowout posts. Although the blog looks the same, there are a few things that have changed, so let’s dive right in…

The Backstory

When I started So About What I Said in 2008 (this month, actually!), blogging was really in its infancy; no one knew exactly what this new medium was. Was it just an online diary? The Internet equivalent of simply spouting off? At first, people weren’t sure what the purpose was, never mind the idea that you could actually become a legitimate blogger, but I knew one thing: I needed to have an online presence — especially for my writing — so I naturally wrote my first post on Blogger.

The years flew by and something pretty amazing happened: I soon fell in love with everything about blogging and the whole blogging community. I discovered just how powerful this medium is, but more important than that, I found my career. It was sort of like finding my place in the world, like coming home, and I knew I wanted to do this for a very, very long time.

In the beginning, the Blogger platform served my needs perfectly. But the more I looked toward the future, the more I began to see the value of owning my own little corner of the Web. Not only is it more professional, but moving to a self-hosted WordPress blog would allow me more flexibility and opportunities; I could take my blogging and my writing to the next level.

That’s where Lisette from High Note Designs comes in. I may be creative, but, umm, tech-savvy has never been one of my strong suits — plus, the thought of trying to migrate EVERYTHING myself and losing 5,000+ posts nearly gave me a heart attack. Lisette is an amazing designer and specializes in moving blogs from Blogger to WordPress, so I knew I needed her in my corner. She was such a joy to work with and helped me bring my new blog vision to life. She never minded answering my millions of questions and took the time to explain everything. I felt like I was enrolled in WordPress 101 and it was a really fun learning experience! And, no blog posts were lost in the transfer process!

An Update on a Classic

Like I said, the overall design of the blog doesn’t look that much different. It was really important to me to keep the essence and feel the same, but you know me — I do like to tweak things every now and then. So you’ll notice a couple subtle changes. The most obvious? The blog went from three to two columns, which means that the sidebar needed to be rearranged a little. I also want to update my ‘Daily Reads’ section, so look for that coming soon — got any suggestions?

As for other changes to be aware of…

I changed the look of the drop-down menus…don’t you love the background color and font size?

aa2My social media icons are also new and spiffy looking. I wanted to incorporate more of the blog’s color palette (read: pink!) and also feature the social media’s logo on each one.

aa6When you click on posts, you’ll see two cool things at the bottom: A collection of Related Posts and social share buttons so you can go to town and share on your favorite social media platform. We’re still in the process of transferring all the photos from Blogger, so if you see a related post without its accompanying photo, don’t worry — all will be fixed once the photo transfer is complete!

Let’s Get Social

Speaking of social media, have you perused my social accounts lately? I gave them a little makeover too — and I did this all by myself!

aa3Facebook: After almost five years, I finally updated my profile photo and added a cover photo!

aa4I also fleshed out the ‘About’ section — some fun facts included!

aa5Twitter: I did the same thing — updated my profile pic and added a cover photo. Why did this take me so long? I also rewrote my bio, adding a few of my byline hot spots!

**Side note: In the name of full disclosure, I didn’t get a chance to make all the changes I wanted to on Pinterest and Instagram, but they are coming! It’s on my massive to-do list, so it will get done! AND, as always, feel free to subscribe to the blog via RSS or subscribe by email to stay in the know!

Are you still with me? Bonus points if you are! Anyway, I couldn’t be more grateful to Lisette for a smooth transition! I think the finished product truly reflects the heart of So About What I Said — honoring its past while also making room for its future. Of course, there are still some things to fix — like making sure all 42,000 photos transfer and fixing broken links — but I’m so excited to get back into the blogging groove! Thanks, friends, for sticking by me this month and being so patient while I got everything in order. I feel like a kid on Christmas morning!

Is there anything you’d like to see? Any posts you’re dying for me to write? Let me know and don’t forget to update your bookmarks to melissablakeblog.com! As always, I love you and our awesome community!! xoxo

Update: Big Blog Move (and…How Are You??)

 
Well, hello there, friends!! It’s nice to see you again…I’ve missed you SO much these past couple weeks! How have you been?

As you can probably imagine, I’ve been working hard at getting things ready for the Big Blog Move — remember how So About What I Said is getting its own domain? There’s a lot of planning and perfecting that goes into the process, and I’m so fortunate to be working with a designer who is helping me through every step. She’ll be sending me mock-ups later today — we’ve had to tweak a few things with the layout/design — and once I approve everything, she’ll migrate my blog over to its new home!!

I. AM. FREAKING. OUT.

So, to take my mind off everything, let’s play a little game, shall we?? I call it “5 Things I’ve Done Lately” because, well, I’m terrible at coming up with catchy titles. Let’s chat about what we’ve been up to these last few weeks! I’ll get the ball rolling…

1. Enjoyed two weekends in a row with my cousins! I hadn’t seen them in a few years and it was WONDERFUL to catch up!


2. I got my first acceptance for Glamour magazine’s Web site!! I’ll be writing a disability/pop culture essay — look for it soon!


3. We lived it up fall-style in the good old Midwest in the best possible way — by going to the apple orchard!! We last went in 2010, so we were due for another fix. And yes, lots of photos will be coming your way in a future blog post!


4. I took advantage of EARLY VOTING yesterday and couldn’t be more excited about this election! #ImWithHer #StrongerTogether


5. My mom bought Spot-It a few weeks ago and now I’m over-the-moon obsessed with it! Have you ever played it? I highly recommend it — but don’t say I didn’t warn you about it addictive quality!

Are you game, friends? What have you been up to lately? I hope everything is going well in your neck of the woods…and be sure to share your “5 Things…” in the comments! It won’t be long now until I’ll be back to regular posting…on my own site!!! Ahhhh, that still doesn’t seem real…I am SO excited!! Thanks, as always, for being so patient. You know how much I love you all… xoxo

So About What I Said Is Getting a New Home!

If you follow me on Facebook or Twitter, you may have seen me allude to a VERY exciting announcement. You’d better be sitting down for this. I’m serious. Pull up a chair. Are you ready?? This is big, I’m telling you!

So About What I Said…

…is moving to a self-hosted WordPress blog!

Translation (mostly for my mom): The blog is getting its own domain!!!

For the last 8 years, this blog has been my sweet haven — it’s literally been my happy place and my sanity at times, too. I’m sure all bloggers say this, but I honestly can’t remember my life before blogging and I don’t know where I’d be today without it. This space has helped me discover who I am, who I’m not and even who I want to become. It’s advanced my writing career by leaps and bounds. And of course, it’s helped me connect with SO MANY amazing people from all over the world.

That’s where you come in, friends! Because let’s be real, So About What I Said wouldn’t be what it is today without all of you; you’re just as much a part of things as I am — and you know I wouldn’t have it any other way!!! I mean, we’ve been through a lot together, haven’t we? We’ve laughed. We’ve cried. We’ve even contemplated in earnest the merits of One Direction…if you can’t do that among friends, then what’s the point, you know?

I’ll be working on getting everything organized and ready for the big move (who knew I could amass so many drafts and random links in only 8 years…?) in the coming weeks, but I’d LOVE to hear your thoughts as well — and I know you’ve got them because, HELLO, you’re awesome and amazing! Did I mention that lately?? Well, you are! Here are some questions to get your thoughts rolling and the creative juices flowing…

1. What design/aesthetic changes would you like to see on the new site?

2. What content changes would you like to see?

3. What suggestions do you have for a smooth transition (because, frankly, my stress eczema is *thisclose to flaring up big time!)?

I’m beyond exciting for this move, as you can probably imagine, but you know me…I wouldn’t be me if I wasn’t terrified just a little bit. That’s perfectly normal, isn’t it? Maybe I just need to up the dosage on my eczema cream?

Anyway, let me know your thoughts to the above questions, either in the comments or by email at mellow1422@aol.com. As always, I thank you all for sticking by me all these years…I LOVE YOU! Now let’s go on a new adventure together, OK…?? xoxo


[Photo via We Heart It]