Well, here it is, friends!! As promised…Ms. Bear has returned to the blog in all her glory! Today, she shares her lessons of the summer and how a nasty fall on one of the first days of school put everything into perspective! As always, she’s bringing the wisdom once again and I always appreciate when she shares that wisdom with us! xoxo
It is so interesting to me that during the summer, I feel like I get more in touch with myself. That’s not always as pleasant as it sounds, however! LOL.
During the school year, life is just like a whirlwind — getting from one day to the next and enjoying the weekends in between. Time just flies by. But, during the summer, there is a bit more downtime. With this extra time comes a certain quietness to the days, even when I am still working summer school. There is time for leisurely lunches, plenty of time to go exercise at the Y, lots of staying up late and sleeping in…well, you get the picture.
However, this extra time also brings with it two challenges. The first is the fact that I really don’t have any hobbies besides exercising! That’s all well and good, but you can’t (and shouldn’t) exercise all the time! I used to be a voracious reader, but now I only read in the evenings. I also used to play my piano, but that has gone by the wayside with the fast pace of life, not to mention the temptation of checking things out online. I also used to spend hours at the public library, but, again, the allure of the computers always ropes me in! This is the first thing I need to work on before I retire! I need to get my hobbies back! I think I need some brand-spanking new hobbies to spice up my life a bit!
The second challenge downtime brings me is that it gives me time to think about Brian, which is a nice thing to do, but brings its own set of issues with it. During the summer, there is more time for me to notice other couples out together. Sometimes I just stop, as I think of what could have been. It also makes me think about what our lives would be like right now if Brian were still here. The most challenging thing this extra time brings is the flashbacks of Brian’s suicide, something I can push out of my mind when I am super busy during the school year. While the initial pain and shock are nowhere near what they were the first few years after his death, sometimes I am still brought to a standstill for a few minutes, as I continue the processing that I think will go on for the rest of my life.
So, in trying to tie both parts of the title of this post together, what does all this have to do with my recent fall??? I learned a very valuable lesson this month from my fall. A bit of catch-up for you: On August 13th, I was out in my yard, all happy and hyped up about coming home from one of the first days back to work. I went out into the yard to place my union yard sign (another story…) and the ground was so hard that I literally tripped right over the sign and landed ON MY HEAD, right on the sidewalk! You know how head wounds bleed, so I ran in the house, screaming for the girls. Janelle, the newly minted CNA, told me in no uncertain terms that I needed to go to the ER right then. Nine hours, 7 stitches, one CAT scan and a boatload of aggravation, dizziness and tears later, Janelle got me home. It’s been quite the recovery and has proven to me that if I don’t slow down, bad things are bound to happen. But, if I do slow down, then I have all the above issues to deal with. I’m sure you can see the irony in this.
So, indirectly, the Great Fall of 2018 has given me a not-so-gentle nudge from the universe telling me that it is my time to start thinking of some of the things I need to think about to prepare for this next phase of my life which will be coming up in a few years. Kind of a scary prospect for me, but I can see now that there are things in my life that I need to change. And, hard as it may be to slow down and make these changes, I think I’m ready for it. Time will tell and I will keep you posted!
Special thanks to Melissa for letting me spill all this out on the blog. It will certainly help to hold me accountable the next time I become totally complacent with my life and stop moving forward. Here’s to the future! Someday, I am going to have to retire and I want to be ready for the fun and sun — and hopefully some new hobbies!
[Thanks to Janelle for snapping the cute photo of Ms. Bear on the slide]