Taking a Spring Break

Good morning, friends! I hope you had a great Easter. You know I ate too much sweet and delicious candy — why does Target have to enable me so darn much?

Anyway, I’ve been thinking a lot about this the last few weeks when planning my work schedule and I’ve decided to take this week off. My mom is on spring break and since it worked out so well when I took a mini vacation over Christmas, I thought now would be the perfect time to take a “spring break” of my own. You know, to rest, relax and recharge those creative juices. So although I won’t be around these parts much this week, I might do a few miscellaneous odds and ends from my “whenever to-do list” — that long list of things I keep meaning to do when I have time. Or maybe I’ll just drink root beer and watch Netflix all day, which I’m most definitely NOT opposed to in the least. I mean, it is vacation after all.

Meanwhile, if you’re in a blog-reading mood, feel free to browse the archives for a peek into my mind and life. And, just for fun, here are some of my favorite quotes from some of this year’s posts so far.


“I maintain that the Art of the Date needs to make a comeback. True, I may not have had my first yet, but when I do? I want it to be an event. A romantic dance, if you will. After all, a date shouldn’t just be something you do to pass the time or because you’re bored. It’s something special and therefore should mean something, you know?” —Love Lounge: Four Relationship Trends We Need In 2016


“Plus, let’s not discount their sexy brains, which is what really got me in the end. They attracted me faster than an ant to a Snickers bar on a hot summer day, and I wanted to bottle up all that hot, sexy brain essence and save it for a rainy day.” —On My Habit of Falling In Love With Medical Residents


“But in the grand scheme of things, what about the simpler things in life? Shouldn’t those have an equal position in the Game of Love too? Things like being someone’s safe landing place, the place where they can let their guard down and not be afraid to be themselves. If you ask me, being someone’s soft and cozy blanket is the ultimate; it makes everything look superficial in comparison. There’s power in making someone feel safe and feeling safe in someone else’s arms, and I can’t help but feel like people are too quick to dismiss that power sometimes.” —Letters To My Future Husband: Letter #177


“OK, let me just be perfectly clear here: I’m seemingly unable to resist falling for these types. I know it’s wrong. I know things will just end in heartbreak. I know we’d never be on the same page about anything. And yet, for some weird, mysterious reason, I get it in my head that it will be different with me. Oh, yes, I wholeheartedly believed in that fantasy. I was going to save that Lost Boy and turn him into a Found Man; it was going to be such a beautiful experience that we share together. I was going to get him to finally open up to me, revealing his true self at long last and we were going to live out our days in glorious happiness.” —MEMO TO MEN: What’s Up With ‘Lost Boys’?


“Before you know it, you hopped yourself up on one too many caffeinated root beers and find yourself spilling your life story to the Best Man when he’s just trying to get out on the dance floor as the DJ leads a rousing rendition of the Conga Line. It’s not pretty, you eventually realize, and you leave the wedding the same way you came — at the end of your very own metaphorical Conga Line.” —Love Lounge: Never Get Involved With Someone You Meet…


“Although it’s not all of me, my disability is a big part of who I am. To get to know me is also getting to know my disability and what role it’s played in my life. Some people may very well say that I shouldn’t focus on my disability so much, that I’m making it more of an issue than it needs to be and I’ll potentially make someone more intimidated just by talking about it in the first place. What do I think of that? That’s a bunch of hogwash — pardon my language, but that’s the truth.” —MEMO TO MEN: 5 Disability Questions To Ask Me

Remember, though: The year is still young, my friends! Have a great week, and I’ll see you right back here next Monday for our regular schedule. I love you all… xoxo

My Essay on Cosmo: “I’m Physically Disabled, But I Want Love…”

I’m SO excited, friends! I achieved one of my lifelong writing goals over the weekend. It’s the culmination of years of studying and honing my craft (OK, and reading A LOT of my favorite glossy magazine!) and writing and re-writing and trying to find just the right words and string just the right sentences together. It’s a most glorious and happy day, indeed.

Are you ready? Can you handle the excitement?

Hold onto your hats…


I’VE BEEN PUBLISHED ON COSMOPOLITAN!!!

Can you believe it? I’ll give you a minute to let that excitement sink in. Recovered? OK, good!

Anyway, my essay I’m Physically Disabled but I Want Love and Sex Too went live on the site last Friday, and I couldn’t be happier. Obviously, it explores a topic that’s near and dear to my heart — love, relationships and what it’s like to be a woman with a disability. My favorite passage…

There’s this pervasive societal perception that women with disabilities aren’t sexy and, even more damaging, that they’re not interested in romantic love and relationships. The misguided belief is that our disability makes us less of a woman, and therefore, we’re not seen as viable partners.

Slowly, I realized something: I let my disability make me feel undesirable and unsexy. It didn’t start that way and it certainly doesn’t have that kind of power. I gave it that power — no one else did. Not my family. Not my friends. And certainly, not men.

I’d spent so many years focused on the external — how I looked, my deformities, my wheelchair — that I’d completely lost sight of who I was on the inside. It was only when I started recognizing everything I did have that I began to smile and feel sexy again. I was witty, intelligent, kind, loving, and loyal. That’s what I chose to define myself by — not those superficial characteristics that will eventually fade and wither away.

You can read the full essay here and I’d love to hear your thoughts — though none of that “Oh, Melissa, try online dating” or “Hey, Melissa, why don’t you get out of the house since you’re such a home-bound person?” Because, you know, we’ve had QUITE enough of that already, don’t you think?

The essay was also picked up by Good Housekeeping, Woman’s Day, Redbook, Marie Claire and ELLE, which means I’m having a pretty stellar week over here!
__________________________________________________

Now that the piece is live, I’ve noticed that we’ve got some new faces around these parts, so I wanted to take a hot minute to welcome you all to my humble abode. I’m so glad you’re here! You can read more about me, my life as a blogger and the editorial structure of So About What I Said, but basically, I write about four topics: Disabilities, relationships, lifestyle and pop culture.

Some of my favorite regular series…

*Letters To My Future Husband
*Love Lounge
*MEMO TO MEN
*Open Letters
*Disabilities In The Media
*Family


You can also connect with me on social media…

*Facebook
*Twitter
*Instagram
*Pinterest
*Bloglovin

Thanks so much friends, old and new! Email me anytime at mellow1422@aol.com and let’s chat! I can’t wait to hear from you! Love you all… xoxo

P.S. And of course, feel free to share my essay on Facebook, Twitter or even your local refrigerator. If you share on Twitter, be sure to tag me @melissablake so we can connect!

5 Reasons I Love Being Home Alone

In the past, I’ve waxed poetic about the joys of dining a la solo — about how I find it utterly calming, about how I don’t understand why people dread it, about how I secretly like to eavesdrop on the conversations of the people around me. It’s all just one enjoyable experience.

Well, I feel the same way about being home alone. And what’s more, I always have. I’m a natural solitary hermit by nature, so I’m sure this has something to do with it, but I’ve never been more content than when I’ve talked my mom and Janelle into running some errands, have ushered them out of the house and have a long afternoon stretched in front of me. Don’t get me wrong, I love them dearly, but a girl’s got to have her freedom. You know, let her hair down every once in awhile. I got an extended taste of that sweet life during my Carefree Bachelorette Weekend and fear I am now addicted. Here are five reasons having the house to yourself rocks in a major way…


1. You can sing at the top of your lungs: Not only is the music of choice a continuous spin of my favorite hits, but there’s no one home to tell me to stop singing! There’s no one saying, “Melissa, stop singing!” Or asking, “Melissa, do you ever stop singing?” Obviously, my answer to that last question is NO. I mean, I have to live out my pop star fantasy somehow, right? So I figure they calls for lots of singing — everything from Taylor Swift to Carrie Underwood to the Grease soundtrack.

2. The chance to be as silly (or as lazy!) as you want: The beauty of being home alone is that you don’t have to answer to anyone about your behavior, however odd it may seem. It’s a virtual free-for-all full of endless possibilities. So you want to eat Lucky Charms for lunch? Go for it. Don’t feel like combing your hair? Well, it’s not like anyone is going to see you anyway. I could even make like Tom Cruise and get wild and crazy — like his character in Risky Business, not like his infamous couch-jumping incident.

3. No one will give you a strange look when you start talking to yourself: I’m a HUGE proponent of talking to yourself when it comes to getting stuff done. Heck, I’m my own sports caster in that I can usually be heard giving a play-by-play of exactly what I’m doing when I’m doing it (thanks for passing on that lovely trait, Mom!), and I like having the freedom of being able to express my frustrations about my laptop without any glaring looks. It’s a glorious freedom unlike anything I’ve ever known, actually.

4. I can have hours of uninterrupted writing time: Too many times in the past, I’ve set myself up at the kitchen table ready to write, only to hear those sounds — the familiar creaking of the garage door, slamming of car doors and shuffling of feet. That could only mean two things. One, my mom and Janelle were home. And two, I wouldn’t be getting much more writing done for the rest of the day. But when all is quiet on the home front? That’s when the creative juices really start flowing and the real writing work can begin.


5. The TV remote: I think this one speaks for itself. There’s really no explanation needed here.

Do you enjoy being home alone, friends,or do you find it lonely? Refreshing? Intimidating? Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got some plotting to do… xoxo

Following So About What I Said and Google Friend Connect

Just a little housekeeping announcement on this lovely Tuesday: As you may have heard, Google is in the process of updating Google Friend Connect. They’re now requiring that people have a Google account when following blogs with GFC and removing people who are following using other accounts, like Yahoo! or Twitter. This is why you may notice a decrease in subscriber numbers of your favorite blogs or why you have been mysteriously unsubscribed from the blogs you read.

Here’s what you need to do…

*You can create a Google account (if you don’t already have one) and re-follow So About What I Said via Google Friend Connect. That way, the blog will be right there on your reading list and updated whenever a new post is added.

*You can follow So About What I Said in a reader such as Feedburner.

*You can subscribe by email and have new posts delivered straight to your inbox. It’s like having the paper delivered to your door every morning!

*You can follow So About What I Said on one of its many social media channels:
              —Facebook
              —Twitter
              —Pinterest
              —Instagram
              —Bloglovin’


Please note: I’m a self-proclaimed social media addict and have been known to post everything from my latest blog post to my sadness over One Direction’s permanent split.

And…I think that’s it! I know that’s a lot of info to throw your way, so let me know if you have any questions, friends! If you’d like, you can also email me at mellow1422@aol.com! You know I’m always here — in the most non-creepy way, of course! xoxo

[Photo via We Heart It]

10 Random Thoughts I Had During My First Day Back at “Work”

We’re already practically through with the first month of 2016, and here I am, just finishing up my first day back at “work.” Well, I suppose that’s not entirely true, which is why I put work in quotes. I’ve been working, make no mistake about that; I’ve just been doing it at home, from my beautiful perch at the kitchen table.

You may remember awhile ago when I told you about my routine of going to the library a couple times each week — yeah for change in scenery and productivity! Who knew? Anyway, after taking off the last month for the holidays, I figured this week was as good a time as any to start making my Monday/Wednesday pilgrimage back to the old place. I mean, you can only let yourself get sidetracked at home for so long before it becomes counterproductive, right? Of course right!

So, here I am! As anyone will likely tell you, the first day back after a long vacation — or weekend, for that matter — is sort of a shock to the system. It’s all a lot to get used to, this return to the old routine. You feel like a deer in the headlights, walking around in a daze and, yet, still fully attuned to everything around you. The overstimulation coupled with the out-of-it feeling doing somersaults in the pit of your stomach make for one heck of a combination. I imagine it would be akin to withdrawing from caffeine — that is, if I ever had the willpower to even try to ween myself from caffeine. But that’s another subject for another blog post.

Anyway, the thoughts kept coming in rapid fire throughout the day. Here, a sampling of my 10 favorites (because, really, if I listed them all, we’d be here all night, and ain’t nobody got time for that!)…

1. When did it get so sunny? Have I turned into a vampire or something? Side note: I’ve mastered the Art of Staying In The House. Seriously, I’ve turned it into quite the art form. My record is 19 consecutive days in the house, and that was just over the holidays! #Seriously #SorryNotSorry


2. Wow, people actually get up this early? It’s like a whole new world!


3. I hope my DVR is recording Dr. Phil; I need my daily dose of therapeutic insight.


4. Is that my stomach rumbling? Gosh, I’m hungry…is it lunch time yet?


5. I wonder what’s going on in the world of celebrity news right now?


6. Why didn’t I win the Powerball?


7. These college kids don’t know how good they have it in life! #YouthIsWastedOnTheYoung


8. What should I buy with my Amazon gift cards?


9. I’ve been working for a solid 20 minutes…time for a Twitter break!


10. Man, do I need a haircut. Hair, GET OUT OF MY EYES! This. Is. So. Annoying.


There you have it, friends! A little peek into my mind on a random Wednesday. What sorts of thoughts run through your head during the day? Care to share? xoxo