Editor’s Note: Song lyrics denoted in bold italics.

This song has been stirring around in my brain for quite awhile now. I don’t know about you, but I’ve about had it UP TO HERE with mansplaining of late. Ever since the election last November, it’s been getting steadily worse and, after a run-in with a particular know-it-all last month, my head practically exploded from the utter frustration of it all. It wasn’t pretty, trust me. But seriously, this habit of men being disrespectful and condescending (not to mention NOT letting you get…one…single…word…out…) is just plain gross. And as you know, friends, I just won’t stand for this kind of nonsense. Maybe that’s why one of Christina Aguilera’s early songs from her sophomore album speaks to me so much lately. It’s a gem and packs one powerful message…

Christina Aguilera’s “Can’t Hold Us Down”
From Stripped

Where do people get this sense of entitlement to feel like they have to put you in your place? Well, maybe that’s not exactly it because there’s a way to do it that isn’t just plain rude. That’s what I’ve taken an issue with lately; you are more than welcomed to your opinion, but there’s a decidedly tactful way to go about expressing said opinion in a way that is respectful, constructive and doesn’t make the other person want to shrivel up in a ball in the corner. You can be opinionated without being forceful about it.

Translation: Don’t be a bully. It’s never a good look on anyone.

So what am I not supposed to have an opinion
Should I keep quiet just because I’m a women
Call me a bitch cause I speak what’s on my mind
Guess it’s easier for you to swallow if I sat and smiled

When a female fires back suddenly big talker don’t know how to act
So he does what every little boy would do

So often, I feel like some people are surprised when I actually open my mouth and have an opinion. Maybe this has something to do with the sad, sad stereotypes surrounding people with disabilities, which is something I’m always working to fight against. And just being a woman in general, I think there’s this different perception of just the act of speaking your mind. We praise men who are assertive and we view it as such a positive thing. But a woman who’s the same way? Oooops, uh-oh! She’s just being pushy and dramatic. Get out of the way — this woman must be dangerous!! Cue my sarcastic voice, of course!

This is for my girls all around the world
Who have come across a man that don’t respect your worth
Thinkin’ all women should be seen and not heard
So what do we do girls, shout out loud
Lettin ’em know were gonna stand our ground
So lift your hands high and wave ’em proud
Take a deep breath and say it loud
Never can, never will
Can’t hold us down

I think the chorus is what I find so uplifting and inspiring about this song. It would be so easy to write this song as nothing more than a laundry list of complaints, but I love the call to action in the lyrics of the chorus. It’s like you’re taking back your power and that is such a refreshing thing when it comes to this topic.

I suppose my message with this post is simple: No one likes to be talked down to or made to feel less than they are, you know? It’s so important to watch your tone and how you’re coming across to other people. Don’t make other people feel bad about themselves. It just shows how horrible of a person you are, so, please, just don’t do it.

Editor’s Note: Song lyrics denoted in bold italics.

When I thought about bringing back Tuesday Tunes for 2017, I knew the song had to be *just* right. I mean, it couldn’t just be any old song; I mean songs like Don’t Stop Believing just weren’t going to cut it today — no offense to Journey or anything. And then Lady Gaga happened. More specifically, she unleashed her powerhouse of a performance at this year’s Super Bowl halftime show, and, well, American went wild. And I was reminded of one very important lesson…the beauty that can come when you’re fully and authentically being who you are. Or, to quote Gaga herself, when you’re “born this way.”

It seems like it was only yesterday when Lady Gaga burst on the scene, immediately letting us know that she was here to stay. She certainly wasn’t going anywhere, and some seven years later, she’s still proving that every single day. I admit that I didn’t quite know what to make of the Lady at first. We really hadn’t seen a musician quite like that in awhile, had we? But then I heard one of her little ditties and I was moved, to say the least. It had such a profound effect on me — and still does to this day…

Lady Gaga’s “Born This Way”
From Born This Way

To say this is a good song would be an understatement. It’s so much more than that. It’s the song — the voice — of an entire generation. It speaks to everyone who’s ever felt different, who’s ever dared to forge their own path and who is brave enough to stand up and say, “No, I don’t want to belong. I want to stand out. Forever.”

There’s nothing wrong with loving who you are
She said, “‘Cause he made you perfect, babe
“So hold your head up girl and you’ll go far,
Listen to me when I say

I don’t know where we pick up this message, but somewhere along the way, we get this idea in our head that it’s a bad thing to love yourself. We think it’s seen as vain or conceited; there are so many negative connotations here, aren’t there? For so long, we’re scared of what people will say or what people will think if we even show just a little bit of pride in ourselves. The horror! The shame! It. Must. Be. Avoided.

I’m beautiful in my way
‘Cause God makes no mistakes
I’m on the right track, baby, I was born this way
Don’t hide yourself in regret
Just love yourself and you’re set
I’m on the right track, baby
I was born this way (Born this way)

Emotions can be so fickle and fluid sometimes, can’t they? They’re up and down, that’s for sure, but eventually, you get to a point where you are able to grab that self-confidence and never let it go. You finally realize that you deserve it and you own it — for, perhaps, the first time in your entire life. It’s a form of self-liberation that I can’t really describe, but I know that I’ve never felt anything remotely like it in my entire life. It’s almost like you’re able to shake yourself of a weight that’s been pulling you down for far too long. You’re not going to be a prisoner to it anymore, so you metaphorically throw it into the ocean without looking back.

As I was watching Gaga’s brilliant performance on Sunday, I kept thinking how cool it would be if I just breezed down the street in my bright red wheelchair — you know, just singing this song. Or maybe lip-sync. I have to capture the grit of her voice, of course. Seriously, though, in these trying times lately, we need a hero. Gaga is stepping up and I’ll gladly follow her any day! xoxo