Hello, friends. When I began Tales From The Trenches last fall, I intended it to be a one-year series. It’s hard to believe we’re coming to the end, isn’t it? Look for the last installment next week. Kasey is going to give us his views on texting when it comes to romance.

In the meantime, here’s a great story from Heather about how she met her husband on the Internet. Thanks for sharing, Heather! xoxo

If people ask how I met my husband, I tell them that we were set up. This is not because I am ashamed that I met him on Match.com, but because I’m trying to avoid the myriad of questions that usually accompany me telling them that’s where I met him.

“Ooh! How long were you on there before you met him?”

Three months.

“Did you go on any bad dates?”

Yes, one.

“Where was your first date?”

A wine bar. He took me there to impress me, and I ordered beer. He said that’s when he knew he wanted to marry me.
And that’s the best case scenario. Worst case is a quick once over (literally like they’re checking me out), and then a judgmental face with a, “Well isn’t that nice.”

Seriously?

My husband is the most wonderful, kind, charming person you’ll meet. And just because we met on the Internet doesn’t mean that the stars didn’t align. Let me tell you our story.

We both joined Match within a week of one another. I jokingly call him the Casanova of Match before he met me. He apparently went on lots of dates with lots of Goldilocks ladies (too tall, too short, too hot, too cold). He had a few short relationships but nothing that tickled his fancy. I joined and had plenty of “winks”, lots of emails, a few phone calls and two bad dates.
My bad date and I hit it off very well on email, so I made the mistake of not talking to him on the phone before we went on our date. To all those online daters out there, that would be my best advice: Talk on the phone before you go on a date. If you don’t have phone chemistry (or if your suitor may possibly sound like they’re constantly sucking on a helium tank), then you will most likely not have face-to-face chemistry. If I had spoken to Bad Date on the phone, I would have known that our personalities didn’t mesh. I’m outgoing and quick witted, Bad Date was reserved and quiet. I really felt like I was carrying the whole date by myself, so much so that I was shocked when he asked me out on a second date during our first date AND sneak-attacked kissed me in the parking lot. Clearly, he wasn’t as reserved as I initially thought. The second date was a PAINFUL dinner at his place followed by an awkward movie and me bolting out the door as soon as the movie was over. Bad Date was never seen again.
Then there was Jeff. He winked at me, so I checked out his profile. He lived about 4 hours away but was finishing up his MBA and wasn’t sure where he wanted to move next. He loved indie music (me too! me too!), traveled a lot (check), had been in a long-term relationship previously where they lived together (uh-huh) and had lived in Chicago but realized that he wanted quality of life so he moved to a smaller, more manageable town (I had just moved back from NYC the year before). We were 86% compatible and he was CUTE. I knew that he lived outside of my “match radius,” but he lived in my hometown so I figured what the hell. I emailed him asking, “So you live in Tulsa? How do you like it?”, and that got the ball rolling. We emailed each other for about 6 weeks and talked on the phone a handful of times before our first date 6 weeks later when I was home for my stepdad’s 60th birthday. The two things I remember most about our first date are the mix CD he made me (I stayed up listening to it after our first date) and walking up to the bar and seeing a cute guy by the front door and hoping that was him. It was.
At the end of our first date, he told me he was coming to Dallas the next weekend to visit a buddy from college. I know now that he just wanted to see me again. That first weekend led to many more weekends and seeing each other as much as we could. It took a wine-happy night with girlfriends to call him up and tell him how much I liked him. He felt the same way, so that next weekend he met my family and a few weeks later, we flew to his hometown and met his. We spent the summer crossing the country so that our families could meet our new loves. As time passed, we learned that we or our families had mutual friends, thus making it all the more serendipitous.

In 6 months and 1 week, we were engaged, and within 6 months after that we were married, bought a home and he had transferred within his company to the city where I lived. We may taken the romance out of matchmaking by meeting on the Internet, but all of the stars aligned to bring us to where we are today. Two happy lovebirds with our cute little house listening to indie music and traveling the world together.

[Photos via We Heart It]

Today’s tales comes to us from Beth of Hello, Splendor. I hope you enjoy! Kasey will be back next week. xoxo
I’m a 6-foot tall blonde. I know: ‘Cry me a river’. While most people would tell me that it’s a blessing, in the dating world, it’s a curse. When you’re that tall, you tend to feel a little less than feminine if you’re not dating a 6-foot-something guy. So, there you have it. My dating pool is smaller than most, because I am dead set on a height requirement. And, of course, in my mind, I’m the only one with this problem.

So, after countless mishaps with men (remind me to tell you about the drug-dealing doctor), I met a pretty cool guy: 6’-4”… dark… handsome. He fit my requirements just perfectly. We traveled together, dined together, frequented museums and just had a really amazing time together. I think we both knew that there wasn’t a deep bond there, but we just had a great time. So, one night we are out with friends having drinks, and I run into a guy friend of mine. I wanted him to meet the guy I was dating. I go in for the introduction, and my friend proceeds to whisper to me that he is also dating this same guy. And, by dating I mean having his way with him in the bar restroom. Awkward! Needless to say, that didn’t work out.
Like I was saying…countless mishaps with men…and still counting.

I hit the self-help books. And let me be clear: I’m not a reader. The extent of my library consists of shelter magazines and Twilight. But, this is what desperation will drive you to. I read He’s Just Not That Into You. I read Dr. Phil’s Love Smart. I felt so silly reading them, but I was in such desperation to find love that every page rang true to me. But, it still wasn’t helping me find my future husband. So, I decided I’m not looking for love. Because, like the books say, when you’re not looking for love, you’ll find it.
I focused on friendships. I found a great group of friends to have drinks with, dine with and just be single with. One of my favorite friends was this 5’-5” guy who was just everything you wanted in a husband and father of your children, except for the height. We had the best time together, but neither one of us would go there – 6” doesn’t seem like much, but the height difference was quite significant. But, I just kept thinking about him. I’d get excited to see him. What was that about?? Then I thought back to Dr. Phil. He wrote that “If you have a ‘type’, clearly that isn’t working out for you.” So, it all came together. I realized that I had a crush on the short guy. Those self-help books were actually good for something!

We go out drinking, get drunk, make out. Then we have our first date a week later. I wore 6-inch heels to see if I could deal with the height difference. And, you know what?? It wasn’t an issue at all. I had been so petty and it had ruled my entire dating life. How ridiculous. It’s amazing what doors are opened up for you when you set aside your vanities and just let yourself just see the person.
So, what happened to the short guy and me? I’ll save the love story for later, because it’s pretty epic. But, here’s what I can tell you: We’re married and have an amazing 8-month old baby. I married my soulmate and my best friend! It just took me a little longer to find him, probably because I couldn’t spot him in the crowd.

[Photos via Le Love and Sabino]