Hello, friends. When I began Tales From The Trenches last fall, I intended it to be a one-year series. It’s hard to believe we’re coming to the end, isn’t it? Look for the last installment next week. Kasey is going to give us his views on texting when it comes to romance.
In the meantime, here’s a great story from Heather about how she met her husband on the Internet. Thanks for sharing, Heather! xoxo
If people ask how I met my husband, I tell them that we were set up. This is not because I am ashamed that I met him on Match.com, but because I’m trying to avoid the myriad of questions that usually accompany me telling them that’s where I met him.
“Ooh! How long were you on there before you met him?”
“Did you go on any bad dates?”
“Where was your first date?”
A wine bar. He took me there to impress me, and I ordered beer. He said that’s when he knew he wanted to marry me.
And that’s the best case scenario. Worst case is a quick once over (literally like they’re checking me out), and then a judgmental face with a, “Well isn’t that nice.”
My husband is the most wonderful, kind, charming person you’ll meet. And just because we met on the Internet doesn’t mean that the stars didn’t align. Let me tell you our story.
We both joined Match within a week of one another. I jokingly call him the Casanova of Match before he met me. He apparently went on lots of dates with lots of Goldilocks ladies (too tall, too short, too hot, too cold). He had a few short relationships but nothing that tickled his fancy. I joined and had plenty of “winks”, lots of emails, a few phone calls and two bad dates.
My bad date and I hit it off very well on email, so I made the mistake of not talking to him on the phone before we went on our date. To all those online daters out there, that would be my best advice: Talk on the phone before you go on a date. If you don’t have phone chemistry (or if your suitor may possibly sound like they’re constantly sucking on a helium tank), then you will most likely not have face-to-face chemistry. If I had spoken to Bad Date on the phone, I would have known that our personalities didn’t mesh. I’m outgoing and quick witted, Bad Date was reserved and quiet. I really felt like I was carrying the whole date by myself, so much so that I was shocked when he asked me out on a second date during our first date AND sneak-attacked kissed me in the parking lot. Clearly, he wasn’t as reserved as I initially thought. The second date was a PAINFUL dinner at his place followed by an awkward movie and me bolting out the door as soon as the movie was over. Bad Date was never seen again.
Then there was Jeff. He winked at me, so I checked out his profile. He lived about 4 hours away but was finishing up his MBA and wasn’t sure where he wanted to move next. He loved indie music (me too! me too!), traveled a lot (check), had been in a long-term relationship previously where they lived together (uh-huh) and had lived in Chicago but realized that he wanted quality of life so he moved to a smaller, more manageable town (I had just moved back from NYC the year before). We were 86% compatible and he was CUTE. I knew that he lived outside of my “match radius,” but he lived in my hometown so I figured what the hell. I emailed him asking, “So you live in Tulsa? How do you like it?”, and that got the ball rolling. We emailed each other for about 6 weeks and talked on the phone a handful of times before our first date 6 weeks later when I was home for my stepdad’s 60th birthday. The two things I remember most about our first date are the mix CD he made me (I stayed up listening to it after our first date) and walking up to the bar and seeing a cute guy by the front door and hoping that was him. It was.
At the end of our first date, he told me he was coming to Dallas the next weekend to visit a buddy from college. I know now that he just wanted to see me again. That first weekend led to many more weekends and seeing each other as much as we could. It took a wine-happy night with girlfriends to call him up and tell him how much I liked him. He felt the same way, so that next weekend he met my family and a few weeks later, we flew to his hometown and met his. We spent the summer crossing the country so that our families could meet our new loves. As time passed, we learned that we or our families had mutual friends, thus making it all the more serendipitous.
In 6 months and 1 week, we were engaged, and within 6 months after that we were married, bought a home and he had transferred within his company to the city where I lived. We may taken the romance out of matchmaking by meeting on the Internet, but all of the stars aligned to bring us to where we are today. Two happy lovebirds with our cute little house listening to indie music and traveling the world together.
[Photos via We Heart It]