Good Golly, Little Richard: An Ode to the Rock & Roll Icon

Little RichardI woke up last weekend to the sad news that the one and only Little Richard had died. On top of a year that hasn’t exactly been on the happy side, 2020 continues to prove that it’s going to be a sad one with the death of everyone’s favorite piano-playing rock and roll power-player.

First of all, let’s just state the obvious: The singer’s name was a complete misnomer. Watch any video of him performing live and you can see right away that there was absolutely nothing “little” about Little Richard. He was a powerhouse, a force of musical nature and incredibly soulful in his delivery style. I mean, he was, perhaps, one of the most-recognizable voices of the ’50s and ’60s; when you hear a Little Richard song, you immediately know you’re hearing a Little Richard song, don’t you?

Not to mention, his songs were some of the greatest in an era marked by the likes of the British Invasion and Motown. We all have a favorite song of his, everything from classics like “Good Golly Miss Molly” to “Long Tall Sally,” and, honestly, his songs are the kind that make you want to tap your feet — that is, if you’re not already up and dancing!

There aren’t many musicians who have the kind of cross-generational appeal that Little Richard had. I vividly remember being around 7 or 8 and my dad setting up these flashing lights so my friends and I could dance around the living room to songs like “Tutti Frutti.” I had no idea what that song title even meant, but that didn’t matter. The song was electric, eclectic and pure exuding energy — just like Little Richard himself. We’d spend hours laughing as we danced around our little apartment, the lights off and the colors of those lights bouncing off the wall as frenetically as the music blaring from the speakers. Honestly, it’s still one of my all-time favorite childhood memories and even some 30 years later, I remember those days as vividly as if they’d just happened yesterday.

Perhaps that’s the mark of a truly great musician. Their music, whether you listened to it yesterday or decades ago, still feels fresh and new. There’s a timeless quality to it that transcends time and space; plus, it’s always there whenever you need it. And, thankfully, those memories are always right there too.

Little RichardIndeed, music has lost a trailblazing icon. Thank you, Little Richard, for the memories and the music. And, of course, thank you for the moves. They were indeed smooth and timeless. What’s your favorite Little Richard song, friends?? xoxo

P.S. More of my musical favorites…

How to Stop Procrastinating and Complete Important Life Tasks

ProcrastinatingUncertainty can make it very hard to get things done. It’s very hard for us to deal with procrastination because we believe we’ll always have a lot of time to complete projects. The problem is that most people who put off projects often never complete them. If you take immediate action, then you’re more likely to stop procrastinating and finish projects.

Let’s assume that you want to ask for a raise from your boss. Your boss might not like the idea of increasing your pay, so you may end up worrying about getting in some kind of trouble for asking. One way to push through this form of uncertainty is to justify your actions in your own mind. If you know for certain that you definitely deserve a raise, then asking for increased pay shouldn’t be a problem. If you don’t feel that you deserve a raise, then the problem might be that you need to simply perform better at your job. Building your skills will increase your confidence, and you won’t worry about asking for a raise because it’s something you know you deserve.

How to Avoid Putting Off Major Projects

Sometimes we procrastinate because a job seems too difficult to complete. This is certainly a problem for many people when it comes to home design projects. You might worry that you’ll first need to clean up your home or move furniture. Some projects are much easier to complete than most people think. Installing floating wall shelves may first seem challenging, but one of these projects can be completed in just a few minutes. There are certainly much harder home improvement projects that take a lot more time to complete.

One reason we put off big home-remodeling projects is that we worry about working with contractors. If we don’t select the right contractor, then they may end up doing subpar work. If you conduct research, then you’ll feel more confident about working with an expert. Learning to ask the right questions is very important.

Procrastination and Personal Relationships

People often put off improving personal relationships out of fear. Communication is an important element of all successful relationships. Healthy relationships require time and effort. If you aren’t willing to put in the time needed to build a strong relationship, then things may get worse over time. Some uncertainty is always guaranteed, but you can improve your chances by telling the other person how you feel. You should never feel afraid to express yourself. Problems occur when people are afraid to speak their mind and inform others about how they are feeling. This is why many therapists recommend couples occasionally engage in arguments to work through their problems. If you don’t take time to work out your problems, then the relationship may permanently fall apart.

Dealing With Uncertainty

Part of the reason people fear uncertainty is that it makes us irrational. Successful people develop ways to cope with uncertainty. Developing the right strategies can make it easier to take action. Successful people remain positive at all times. It can be very tempting to become negative when it comes time to make decisions, but remaining positive can help uncertain people cope with dilemmas. Successful people deal with uncertainty by accepting the fact that there are some things they cannot control. Many problems might be much easier to deal with than you think. People can also cope with uncertainty by:

• Becoming more knowledgeable
• Taking small steps in the beginning
• Working on controlling their emotions

You will fear uncertainty a lot less if you know as much as you can about the thing you are worried about. Taking small steps is important because you may get overwhelmed by the amount of work that needs to be done. Just completing a little bit of work a day can make a seemingly impossible task manageable. Improving your emotional intelligence can help you reduce uncertainty. Many fears that people have are simply irrational, and people can dispel these fears by regulating their emotions. Try not to take action when you are in a bad mood. Avoid making rash decisions as much as possible. If you carefully design your project, then you’re more likely to know exactly what to do when it’s time to execute your plans.

Procrastinating–Sara Stringer is a freelance writer who most enjoys blogging about lifestyle, relationships and life as a woman. In her spare time, she enjoys soaking up the sunshine with her husband and two kids. Compensation was received for the editing and publishing of this article.

[Photos via Unsplash]

My Essay on SheKnows: “Why Complimenting Adele’s Weight Loss is Toxic”

AdeleHave you been following the story about Adele and the reaction to her weight loss this week?? In a word, the reaction is gross, so naturally, I tweeted my thoughts about it. And then, that tweet had a semi-viral moment of its own, which became the basis for my newest piece for SheKnows…

We first saw people commenting on the singer’s new, slimmer figure back in December when she posted some holiday photos. I was disgusted then when I saw comments saying how “gorgeous” and “beautiful” she looked. So it’s no surprise that I was even more disgusted when people started in again with those same types of comments last week. Adele posted this photo on Instagram to thank people for birthday wishes and to thank frontline workers for all they’re doing.

She made NO MENTION of her body or her weight-loss journey. And yet, that’s what people chose to fixate on.

After I tweeted this, my thoughts had a mini viral moment of their own! Hooray!!

Not so hooray?? Tons of disappointing comments about weight and beauty. Some of y’all need to check yourselves. Your fatphobia is showing and that’s most definitely not beautiful. The responses to that tweet made me want to write about Adele even more and I’m so glad my piece found a home!!

Here’s an excerpt of the piece, in which I tackle our society’s misconception that weight is somehow tied to beauty and that thin is the ultimate standard…

I’ve been thinking a lot about the reactions I’ve seen over the last two days, especially when it comes to the unspoken meaning behind people’s words. When people praise Adele for her “beauty transformation,” there’s this fatphobic subtext implying that fat is bad. We live in a culture where there are only two ways of being: Fat or thin. Fat is bad and thin is good. Fat is wrong and thin is right. Fat is out and thin is in.

That’s it. People have taken something as complex as the human body and reduced it down to such simplistic extremes, leaving zero room for anything else. We need to get away from this simplistic thinking because there’s a whole host of shades in between; people are not monoliths who are one or the other. Our bodies are as individual as we are and there are so many different points on the continuum. As cheesy as it sounds, we really do come in all shapes and sizes.

AdeleYou can read the full piece here and I’d love to hear your thoughts. Feel free to email me anytime at mellow1422@aol.com and let’s chat! And of course, feel free to share my essay on Facebook, Twitter or even your local refrigerator. If you share on Twitter, be sure to tag me @melissablake so I see your tweet and we can connect! I can’t wait to hear from you! Love you all… xoxo

Happy Mother’s Day to the Best Mom (Spoiler Alert: It’s Ms. Bear)

momDear Ms. Bear (the BEST mom ever!)…

I’ve written a blog post for Mother’s Day every year since 2009 — whew, that’s a lot of blog posts! But then again, there’s been a lot to say — err, write! Don’t worry, though! As you can see from the last decade, it’s all good things! It’s hard to pack everything you mean to me in just one post, isn’t it? You inspire me, lift me up, keep me honest, make me laugh (especially with your adorableness!) and, of course, love me unconditionally. Just as I love you unconditionally.

Of course, 2020 hasn’t exactly panned out like we thought it would. For the last nine weeks (or has it been 10…? Who even knows anymore…?), we’ve been quarantining together. We’ve had our moments of frustration and maybe a bit of too much togetherness at times — like when you casually drop a hint with “Wow, you’re really chatty today!” — but other than that, I’ve treasured this time we’ve spent at home and there is no one else I’d rather be in the depths of stay-at-home mode with than you!

I was thinking last week about what I wanted to say in this blog post and that’s when it hit me: Over the last nine weeks, I’ve gotten to see a side of you I don’t get to see very often.

momThe side that relaxes and rests.

You’re usually such a bundle of energy, flitting quickly from here to there faster than the Energizer Bunny, that I can barely keep up with you. In fact, I’m usually the one who is telling you to “SLOW DOWN” and “SIT DOWN,” right, Bert? I mean, I get worn out just watching you go, go, go!!

But since we’ve been home, I’ve actually seen you slow down. You’re relaxing. You’re getting the proper amount of sleep. You’re getting out in nature — and following proper social distancing protocols, of course! And you’re, perhaps for the first time ever, listening to your body. It’s quite a sight to behold — one I’m so grateful for.

You and I have always been a team!! Through good times and bad. Through laughter and tears. Through Yahtzee wins and losses. Through binge-watching The Golden Girls multiple times, including right now. You’re the best of the best and my hero for life!! Happy Mother’s Day, Mom!! You’re aces in my book and thank you for everything!! Now, go and sit down, please!! xoxo

Editor’s Note: As I was finishing up this post, Ms. Bear said “Why don’t you put the links to all the past Mother’s Day posts for me!” Well, who am I to deny my lovely mom?? Here you go, for your reading pleasure: 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018 and 2019.

Ms. Bear Memories: On My Childhood Home

childhood home childhood homeThe wonderful Ms. Bear is back on the blog again today, friends! This time, she’s sharing memories of her childhood home, complete with photos!! Enjoy… xoxo

I beg to differ with the old adage, “You can’t go home again.” Of course, you physically can’t transport yourself to the past, but if you work at keeping the memories alive, you can visit anytime you want! Maybe it’s because my parents and my husband are all dead, but I feel I spend a fair amount of time in thoughts of the past. It’s not that I live in the past; it’s just that thinking about it makes me happy!

Maybe that is why this little gift from my sister is so important to me — see the photos above! You see, I grew up in a bi-level house and when I opened this little model, I just about exploded with joy! It looks so much like the house I grew up in…it’s uncanny!

When I think of memories from my house in Lombard, Illinois, I remember it as big. Imagine my surprise when I recently looked it up on Zillow and realized it was only 982 sq feet! There were 5 of us living there, during all my formative years. We had 3 bedrooms and only 1 bathroom! It’s funny, but I don’t ever remember feeling crowded.

childhood homeWhat do I remember about my house growing up?

Well, I remember feeling loved and cared for every day. I remember hot breakfasts in the morning, a lovely sack lunch for school and a hot meal every night, ready as soon as my dad got home from work. I remember my piano and our first color TV! I also remember playing baseball in my backyard, with all the kids in the neighborhood. I remember going from house to house with my friends, getting drinks after riding bikes around the neighborhood. We also had our elementary school park a couple blocks from our house, and you can imagine the fun we had there! When it turned dark, we would bring out our flashlights and play flashlight tag. Of course, we had to be back at my house as soon as the street lights came on. That was non-negotiable!

childhood homeMy house made me feel safe and loved. Things like holidays and weekends really stand out in my mind as family time. I can actually still see all the rooms of my house in my head. I always say my childhood was like something out of The Wonder Years and for that I am so grateful.

That little house on Greenfield will always be part of who I am. It really was the best of times! Thank you, little house, for sheltering us for all those years. I’ll never forget you, my childhood home…