The Independent writing Archives - So About What I Said

Wednesday, July 24, 2019

My Essay on The Independent: “If You Think Beto Is ‘Born to Do It’ and Kamala Is a ‘Great VP for Joe’, You Need to Change Your Attitude…”

Freelance writer confession: I have this habit of sending pitches at night. Late at night. Like, really late at night — we’re talking well after midnight here. If I get an idea (or if there’s a timely op-ed that I just need to write about), then you can usually find me curled up in my bed, dashing off pitches, the bright light of my iPhone guiding me ever onward. That’s exactly how this piece for The Independent came to fruition. The subjects of the piece? Beto O’Rourke and Kamala Harris…

I got to write about the differences in media coverage between male and female candidates in the 2020 election. Why do we continue to insist that women politicians must be likeable above all else while not holding men to those same standards? It frustrates me to no end, especially when it comes to Beto O’Rourke and Kamala Harris.

Frankly, there are too many sexist assumptions to count when it comes to the upcoming election. Too. Many. To. Count. Honestly, if I think about it too much, my head starts to hurt and I become, umm, one big ball of rage!

Here’s an excerpt of the piece, in which I question some of the messages we’re sending when we cover male and female candidates so differently and how female candidates seem to be up against something far more sinister than politics itself: the relatability factor…

When women are used merely to bolster a man’s ticket or ignored entirely when a man hits the stage, there is no progress. After rumors abounded this week about the possibility of Biden “balancing his ticket” with Harris, I was glad to see her tell voters in New Hampshire that her male counterpart “would be a great running-mate. As vice president, he’s shown he can do the job.” I hope the sentiment goes beyond a soundbite.
That future just might be the one where women can come out ahead. Let’s hope America is listening.

You can read the full piece here and I’d love to hear your thoughts. Feel free to email me anytime at mellow1422@aol.com and let’s chat! And of course, feel free to share my essay on Facebook, Twitter or even your local refrigerator. If you share on Twitter, be sure to tag me @melissablake so we can connect! I can’t wait to hear from you! Love you all… xoxo

Tuesday, July 23, 2019

My Essay on The Independent: “AOC and Maxine Waters Took a Stand Against Mansplaining…”

You know what, friends?? I’ve realized something about all the op-eds that I’ve been writing for the last six months: Most of them are about some dangerous aspect of the patriarchy and its treatment of women. Take this op-ed about AOC and Maxine Waters pushing back against mansplainers in Congress.

Here’s how my days typically go when I’m on deadline for a timely op-ed: I get the acceptance in the morning, turn in the piece at 1 p.m. and see it publish around 3:30 p.m.! This is my first for The Independent (yes, I know I didn’t share my pieces for The Independent in chronological order), but definitely not my first time taking men to task for their mansplaining…

Isn’t what happened to AOC and Maxine Waters all too familiar?? I mean, it’s becoming a broken record at this point, and women are sick of it! Their exchanges with men mirror, on a national level, what women all across the country have experienced. In all occupations, not just politics, and in seemingly every area of life.

We’re tired. It’s amazing (and frustrating) the number of times men have swooped in on Facebook or Twitter to try and “explain” something to me, only to act incredibly insulted when I pushed back.

But this piece for The Independent started with this tweet I posted after I heard about Paul Ryan trying to give AOC some “little tips” about being in Congress. Ugh, ugh, ugh….where’s the eye-roll emoji when you need it? Ironically, men even tried to mansplain to me in response to said tweet; I think the irony was lost on them, though.

Here’s an excerpt of the piece, in which I remind the world, yet again, that women are not required to listen to men…

It’s 2019, but it seems that a lot of men still have yet to grasp that the women in their lives didn’t ask for an explanation in the first place. They operate under the assumption that women are in desperate need of help, that they aren’t capable of completing or understanding tasks themselves, and that a man’s advice will magically save the day.
Yet the women I know? We’re tired. We’re tired of being underestimated and not taken seriously. We’re tired of being seen as weak and incapable. I’m starting to lose count of the number of times men have swooped in on Facebook or Twitter to try and “explain” something to me, only to act incredibly insulted when I pushed back; it’s as if they think I’m somehow required to listen.

My tweet about Paul Ryan and AOC was also included in a HuffPost round-up…right below Stephen Colbert’s tweet!! The Purveyor of the Matriarchy strikes again!

Thursday, July 4, 2019

My Essay on The Independent: “…I’ll Be Celebrating the Fourth of July Very Differently This Year”

Happy Fourth of July, friends! Instead of the usual jolly, patriotic fanfare that I usually bring to the blog every year on this historic American holiday, I’d like to talk about something more serious today. Because honestly? Well, I cringed when I wrote the word ‘happy‘ next to Fourth of July. I cringed because in 2019, we can’t look at things like the American flag and smile and beam with pride. At least, I can’t.

In fact, I wrote about this very topic for my newest op-ed in The Independent. Why? Because, frankly, things in our country seem downright dire these days. I know I’ve said that before, but you know what? I’m going to keep saying it until I don’t need to say it anymore — until the day when things actually change for the better. Some days, I worry that day will never come, that it’s some sort of impossible dream that will never come true.

Here’s an excerpt of the piece, in which I wrote about how I’ll be “celebrating” the Fourth of July today and I hope that you’ll follow my lead…

So, yes, Lady Liberty is weeping this year. And we should be too. So this year, to “celebrate” the Fourth of July, I’ll be donating to organizations that are fighting to end family separation. It’s something I can do. It’s my way of saying to families at the border, “Yes, I see you and I’m with you.”
We as Americans are not any different than those crossing the border and it’s important that we remember that as we celebrate things like freedom and the ideals of this country. On the Fourth of July and every day. Immigrants don’t break this country; they make this country. They make it the beautiful melting pot that it is – rich in culture.

Thursday, June 6, 2019

My Essay on The Independent: “Watching Elizabeth Warren Debate With Meghan McCain on The View…”

My third op-ed for The Independent is live!! Yes, I know that I haven’t posted the first two, but this one is particularly timely, so I wanted to get it up ASAP. I got to write about The View (fan!), the power of women’s voices (super fan!) and why the exchange between co-host Meghan McCain and Senator Elizabeth Warren was so powerful.

It’s no secret that I’ve been a fan of The View for YEARS — I mean, I even wrote an entire blog post about how I’d make a great co-host. That, my friends, is how dedicated I am! So when I heard that The New York Times magazine recognized the show as “most important political TV show in America,” I about screamed for joy! But, of course, I wasn’t surprised! The View has been redefining the genre of daytime talk for more than 20 years. It’s put strong, powerful women at the forefront of smart, relevant and engaging television.

And when it comes to the looming 2020 elections, those smart women are going to be on the front lines! I don’t think it’s a coincidence that the show is more visible than ever right now. In a time when women are continually being silenced and made to feel like they don’t matter, a female-led show being recognized like this is groundbreaking — it says that, yes, women have a voice and we’re going to use it. It says that, yes, women are allowed to have strong opinions, and those strong opinions aren’t “being hysterical.” This says a lot about women, power and being vocal, especially in a time when so many aspects of our lives are being threatened. The hosts of The View are coming to the table, literally, and showing women that’s it’s OK to speak up and to have a voice. For a long time, I was insecure and afraid to voice my opinion, but that show has taught me the power in being vocal and not apologizing for it.

Here’s an excerpt of the piece, which Meghan McCain herself retweeted and commented on, so basically, I’m living my best life this week…

In fact, this isn’t the first time The View has sat down with a 2020 Democratic candidate. Warren’s interview marks The View’s 13th Democratic candidate on the show, meaning the hosts have interviewed half the candidates who have announced their run. Candidates see the show as a must-stop on the campaign trail – a legitimate forum to talk about the issues that matter most. The show has become a key player in our national political conversation, and it says a lot that an all-female program is having such an influence on the 2020 election.
At a time when women’s rights are being threatened across America, such a show isn’t just refreshing: it’s nationally necessary, for all of us.