Beautiful Words From Roald Dahl on His 100th Birthday

Roald Dahl had one of those creative minds — the kind that helped him pen such imaginative classics as Matilda, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and James and the Giant Peach. He certainly had a way with words, that’s for sure, and his words just seem to ring true.

Take his wise words from The Twits, for example…

“If a person has ugly thoughts, it begins to show on the face. And when that person has ugly thoughts every day, every week, every year, the face gets uglier and uglier until you can hardly bear to look at it.

A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly. You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts it will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.”

Although published for the first time in 1980, these words still mean as much — if not more — today as they did 36 years ago. The world can be quite an ugly place, full of hatred and jealousy and just general meanness, and just because people can act downright cruel at times doesn’t mean that we have to return the gesture. We can choose to keep our heads held high and we can choose to be kind. We don’t have to let others’ bad attitudes — their ‘ugliness’ — consume us as well. We have the power to choose our own thoughts. And we can let those thoughts be good and beautiful.

It’s all about killing them with kindness, right?? After all, the world can be a pretty dark place. Don’t you want to be the shining light among the darkness? xoxo

P.S. Remember these adorable Roald Dahl postage stamps? 🙂

[Photo via We Heart It]

In The Pursuit of Happiness: Serena Williams on Heartbreak

There was a time when I was *sure* that all my surgeries were the ultimate worst. Like, the worst thing that could EVER happen to me. Especially throughout my teen years, I’d look around and think, “Wow, don’t my peers have it so easy?“

It wasn’t that I was constantly saying, “Woe is me…” and feeling sorry for myself — it was more of an observation, something that I noticed about the world around me. I’d hear peers and friends bemoan the confusing ins and outs of love and boyfriends, but I couldn’t imagine it being any more difficult or confusing than those 20+ surgeries I’d endured.
Well, I celebrated the 20th anniversary of my last surgery over the summer, and that milestone (hopefully!) signals the end of my medical journey — at least for the time being. And you know what I realized?
In the grand Surgeries vs. Relationships Debate, I’m completely wrong. And, I’ve been completely wrong all these years. Seriously wrong.
As it turns out, I’m not alone! Back in 2012, tennis ace Serena Williams shared a similar sentiment when she appeared on an episode of Piers Morgan Live…

“I think everyone kind of goes through [heartbreak]. It definitely isn’t a good feeling. I think having surgery is definitely a lot easier — having a pulmonary embolism is definitely a lot easier than a heartbreak.”

Heartbreak as something even worse than something like a pulmonary embolism? This was quite the deep revelation, people! Profound, even, and obviously something I’ve never thought of. I mean, I’d always looked at my medical past as a huge detriment — you know, as if it were thing gigantic obstacle that was unmovable and in my face ALL THE TIME. But, really, maybe those surgeries were a cake walk compared to matters of the heart — metaphorically, speaking, of course. Maybe heartbreak is akin to walking barefoot across a hot rake of flaming coals. Maybe getting through all those surgeries was really just a walk in the park, you know?

So the way I see it, I suppose I shouldn’t really feel all that bad by my spinning head when it comes to all this whole relationship stuff. And you know what that means, right? I. Am. Perfectly. Normal.


Hallelujah, friends! Now that is most definitely something to rejoice about! xoxo

[Quote via The Cut]

Tuesday Tunes: Bon Jovi’s “It’s My Life”

Editor’s Note: Song lyrics denoted in bold italics.

I don’t think it’s a coincidence that I entered young adulthood at the dawn of the new Millennium. Things were changing big time and I was growing up. Everything seemed new, like you were doing it for the first time, and the novelty hadn’t worn off yet or even smudged. There was a palpable freshness in the air; you couldn’t help but feel like anything was possible. Simply put, it was quite an exciting time to be alive. Full of hope and promise of great things to come.

Yes, I know that last paragraph read like a high school graduation speech, but I suppose that’s only appropriate. I mean, I did graduate high school in 2000 (sounds like a lifetime ago now, doesn’t it?) and you really can’t get more new-beginning than that. And back then, when I’d think of new beginnings, there was always one anthem that came to mind. I say anthem because I can just picture it blaring over the speakers in an arena during a rock concert. That, or blaring over the CD player as I sing along and do my fiercest poses in front of the mirror. I vote for the latter.

Bon Jovi’s “It’s My Life”
From Crush

Maybe that’s why I thought of this song as I was working on the back-to-school post yesterday. Of course, there were SO MANY killer Bon Jovi tunes to choose from, but this one spoke to a new generation — my generation — so it sort of felt like a theme song for the masses, you know?

This ain’t a song for the broken-hearted
No silent prayer for the faith-departed
I ain’t gonna be just a face in the crowd
You’re gonna hear my voice
When I shout it out loud

Youth is nothing if not a time for feeling lost and confused. You’re having all these new experiences and just trying to find meaning and purpose in life. It’s hard, isn’t it? And you think that things are NEVER going to get any easier; you might even think you’ll never find your way. So you end up wandering around searching for those answers and sometimes, even before you arrive at any kind of conclusion, you realize something else. You’re a young adult. This life you’re living?

IT’S YOURS!!!

I know, it can be quite the shocking revelation when it hits you that first time. Sort of like a bolt of lightning or a giant light bulb going off over your head. That’s how it was for me, at least. And of course, you’re determined to make your voice heard. Loud and clear. To anyone and everyone in your life. Not in an evil or malicious way — just in a way that lets people know who you are. Because you’re starting to see that your voice is a powerful thing and you’re going to own it.

It’s my life
It’s now or never
I ain’t gonna live forever
I just want to live while I’m alive
(It’s my life)
My heart is like an open highway
Like Frankie said
I did it my way
I just wanna live while I’m alive
It’s my life

People say that there’s a sense of invincibility that comes with being young, but I also think there’s a certain sense of urgency that goes along with it. It’s the first time you’re really realizing that your life is finite, that you’re not going to live forever and that it’s what you do with your life that matters the most. You may not know everything, but you know that you want your life to mean something. You want to live it to the fullest, to live it on your terms. But perhaps most of all, you don’t want anything to stand in your way. Ever.

This is for the ones who stood their ground
For Tommy and Gina who never backed down
Tomorrow’s getting harder make no mistake
Luck ain’t even lucky
Got to make your own breaks

Stand your ground? What does that even mean? I do wonder about that sometimes, and the older I get, the more I think it’s all about tuning out that excess noise. It’s not letting people get inside your head — especially the ones that don’t matter. It’s about not believing what people say about you, even though you’re struggling to just shrug off those cruel and hurtful words. It’s about not giving into those inner demons that are all sorts of hell-bent on destroying you — but you’re determined not to let them, though. Most importantly, it’s about BEING WHO YOU ARE and not being afraid to show your true colors to the entire world.

This life is hard. Really hard. There’s just no way around it. But that certainly doesn’t mean that this life can’t be beautiful and that you shouldn’t shine your light for all to see. After all, remember what I always say?? #BeBraveBeYou

In The Pursuit of Happiness: Jennifer Aniston on Society’s Expectations For Women

She’ll be there for us — see what I did there? Jennifer Aniston stood up to body bullies everywhere last week when she took to the Internet to dispel those pesky pregnancy rumors that she just can’t seem to dodge these days.

Everyone’s favorite friend (ha, I did it again!) penned a refreshingly real and honest essay for The Huffington Post in which she took aim at the unrealistic expectations our society places on women…

If I am some kind of symbol to some people out there, then clearly I am an example of the lens through which we, as a society, view our mothers, daughters, sisters, wives, female friends and colleagues. The objectification and scrutiny we put women through is absurd and disturbing. The way I am portrayed by the media is simply a reflection of how we see and portray women in general, measured against some warped standard of beauty.

But what I *really* loved? I mean, loved to the point that I wanted to pump my fist in the air and scream, “YES! Thank you, Jennifer! That’s one victory for women!” — however, I’m in the quiet library right now, so I figured that wasn’t the very best idea…

Here’s where I come out on this topic: we are complete with or without a mate, with or without a child. We get to decide for ourselves what is beautiful when it comes to our bodies. That decision is ours and ours alone. Let’s make that decision for ourselves and for the young women in this world who look to us as examples. Let’s make that decision consciously, outside of the tabloid noise. We don’t need to be married or mothers to be complete. We get to determine our own “happily ever after” for ourselves.

Hmmm, writing our own version of happily ever after. In our culture, that’s sort of a radical, out-there notion, isn’t it? We’re conditioned to want and strive for certain things in life — boyfriend, wedding, house, kids. In that order. If we deviate from that script, even ever so slightly, we’re criticized or labeled or bullied. And even though it shouldn’t, all this finger wagging can mess with our confidence and sense of self. We start to question if we’re on the “right” path and what is wrong with us if we’re not.

I know I’ve never been immune to all this bullying, and I’m forever having this internal conversation with myself where I’m trying to talk myself out of getting down on myself. Because it’s all too easy to let that outside noise become the voice you start to hear in your head — and we all know that outside noise is the LAST thing you need to be listening to. It lies and tries to get you all sorts of worked up. At the very least, I’ve found, it just makes you extremely tired and exhausted.

So, I say we change the conversation. I say we stop putting ourselves and others down just because of those crazy “expectations” we grew up with. I say we start living life on our terms, bullies be damned. And at the end of the day, I say we start celebrating each other because we’re pretty darn awesome just as we are. Who’s with me and Jennifer?? #BeBraveBeYou xoxo

P.S. More wise words on feminism, finding balance, body image, mental illness and being yourself! 🙂

In Which I Reflect on My Disability…

Clarity is a funny thing. It’s something we all want, but it’s one of those things that can’t be rushed. It’s going to come in its own sweet time. Still, that doesn’t stop us from constantly looking for that light bulb moment.
Eventually, that light bulb moment comes shining through — sometimes, just when you need it the most. I was doing some cleaning over the weekend and came across these words. I wrote them some six years ago, when I was deep in the throes of my depression.

I hate my disability right now. I always thought I had come to terms with it and even learned to love it, but now it just makes me feel useless, like some giant waste of space. What is my purpose? How can I be a contributing member of society? I just want to make my family proud, and I feel like I’m letting them down.

And speaking of family, I touched on them, too…

I worry about my family. I feel so traumatized by my father’s death, and I’m scared that those panicky feelings are never going to go away. I don’t want to be alone. I don’t want to feel like I’m sinking. But at the same time, I also don’t want to be a burden to the people I love the most in the whole world. We used to be so happy — nothing bad, it seemed, ever happened to us — and now I don’t know how we’ll ever make it to the other side of this journey. I need my family. I need them more than they probably even realize. I need them to tell me everything is going to be OK. I need them to love me. I need them to hold onto me so I can just stop sinking. And sometimes, I just want to sit with them and cry — cry on their shoulders and just get all my worries out.

It’s interesting that I’d choose to focus on something like my disability, especially considering all the emotions running through me at the time. But maybe it was important that I dealt with these feelings then because it helped give me such a clear sense of clarity now.

It’s strange how things work out like that sometimes, isn’t it? Have you ever felt like this, friends? How did your moment of clarity arrive? xoxo