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Thursday, January 23, 2020

All the Feels: How Frozen 2’s Kristoff Redefined Masculinity For a New Generation

KristoffAs I mentioned yesterday, there’s A LOT going on in Frozen 2 — even beyond the powerful statements about sisterhood. Case in point: The adorably sweet and lovable Kristoff. The portrayal of his character and how he presents healthy masculinity is such a groundbreaking Disney first and it’s so important that we keep talking about it, even long after the movie is gone from the theaters.

First, though, I must admit something: I didn’t pick up on this right away. Don’t get me wrong — I’ve always loved Kristoff, with his sheepish grin and boyish nature. Plus, did you know that he was raised by trolls?? How cool is that?? Like I said, there’s a lot to love about this guy. But as I sat in the theater, I was so focused on Elsa and Anna and completely absorbed in their sisterly love, so I think I overlooked Kristoff’s storyline. Or maybe I just passed it off as not that important??

Well, friends, I’m here to tell you: His storyline IS important! It’s so important. And the fact that this is a Disney movie makes it even more meaningful. We’re so used to the typical Disney trope: Damsel in distress. Dashing prince on horseback gallops up and saves her — and saves the day in the process. The prince is deemed the hero and everything is happy for all eternity, but usually not before there’s a snag or two — namely, the princess strolls about singing some catchy but morose song about how she doesn’t know how said prince feels about her and how she has no idea where their relationship is going.

Yet in Frozen 2, it’s Elsa and Anna who are the heroes. They’re the ones who are in charge and saving the day on their own. They don’t need a prince at all. So here we see Kristoff being the one left behind to do the pining and pondering. In fact, he sings a monstrous ’80s-inspired power ballad about his feelings.

KristoffSinging about his feelings. His genuine, honest, vulnerable feelings and, well, it’s AMAZING to see him not holding back in any way. He isn’t afraid to talk about his feelings. He’s not afraid of being seen as a “weak” man. And he certainly isn’t too prideful to put it all out there.

And all throughout the film, he’s the one selflessly supporting Anna with key lines like…

*”My love is not fragile.”

*”I’m here. What do you need?”

Do you see just how powerful this is? In a world that is still dripping with toxic masculinity — those dangerous things we teach boys about what it means to “be a man” — here’s Kristoff essentially rejecting all that. In its place, he gives us a new version of masculinity — one that is healthy and evolved and every mood that we need in 2020. He’s Elsa and Anna’s equal; instead of trying to save them in the epic battle, he’s fighting alongside them.

That is the definition of a real man. I’m telling my kids that this is healthy masculinity. Men being vulnerable is sexy. Men talking about their feelings is sexy. Men sharing their emotions is sexy.

Kristoff is all those things. Be more like Kristoff. Please, world, be more like Kristoff. We need you now more than ever… xoxo

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Leave a Comment Filed Under: fairytales, Love Lessons, movies

Thursday, September 8, 2016

Dream Vacation: Fairytale Architecture In Norway

Ooohhh, be still my heart! How fun would it be to get completely lost in these gorgeously whimsical spots in Norway??

Europe has always been on my travel bucket list — there’s such a sense of history in EVERYTHING! Have you ever been to Europe, friends? xoxo

[Via Bored Panda]

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1 Comment Filed Under: design, dream vacation, Entertainment and Media, fairytales, Photographs, Uncategorized

Tuesday, August 18, 2015

The Science of Love: What We Learn From Fairy Tales

I’ll be the first to admit that I’ve been known to romanticize a fairy tale or two (or three or four…) in the past. And if we’re being honest, I think we’ve all done this at one point or another. It’s so easy that sometimes we probably don’t even think about it, especially when we’re young and are so sure that Prince Charming is out there somewhere with that glass slipper, just waiting to slip it on our feet.

But what about the real-world lessons found in the subtext of said fairy tales? It seems like those sorts of lessons become more and more apparent with age — and we all know that I’m getting older! I knew I couldn’t be the only one looking for these deeper lessons, so I turned to clinical psychologist and personality expert Sue Thompson, who had these words of wisdom to share about the upside of even “dark” stories…

What do fairy tales teach us about love and life? First, I believe they are “safe” ways to address the fact that there is evil in the world and it can touch us personally. Snow White, Little Red Riding Hood, Cinderella and The Ugly Duckling inform us that there are bad people in the world who will take advantage of us, stab us in the back, step in front of us when it’s our turn in line and even seek to harm us. 


They also teach us how to respond: that no matter how cruelly we’ve been treated, it will serve us well to forgive, ignore or stand aside. An “evil queen” may hate our guts, but we must look for those around us who love us and will always seek our good. Fairy tales can be downright inspirational when we are in the midst of troubles!

Translation: You can be strong, even in the face of adversity. That’s a pretty powerful lesson, don’t you think, friends? Do you agree? What’s your favorite “adult” lesson from fairy tales? Has your opinion of them changed over the years? Let’s chat! xoxo

P.S. Fairy tale posters and more wise words! 🙂

[Photos via We Heart It]

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1 Comment Filed Under: fairytales, From The Experts, lessons from fairytales, Love Lessons, The Science of Love, The Science of Love series, Uncategorized

Monday, June 15, 2015

Wise Words on Fairytales

I was going through some old emails this afternoon and found these wise words I’d saved from psychologist Dr. Nancy Irwin, whom I interviewed several years ago for an article on fairytales. I love what she has to say about what they can teach us about love and life…

Most fairy tales are little morality plays. They are are Greek myths….archetypes to live by. If you are “good”, you will be rewarded eventually (Cinderalla); truth wins in the end (The Emperor’s New Clothes), love saves us from evil (Snow White); be careful what you wish for (The Three Wishes); fear can be imaginary (Jack and the Beanstalk); life is dynamic (The Ugly Duckling).  

Women can use these truths to write their own happy endings to their life stories. We must be careful not to take these stories TOO seriously and believe that if we are not blonde, blue-eyed virgins that there is no prince. The prince may not be on a white horse; he may drive a Ford pick-up.

How refreshing is that? It makes me want to open up a blank book and start writing my own life story! What would you write in yours, friends? Let’s share! xoxo

[Photo via We Heart It]

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1 Comment Filed Under: books, childhood week, fairytales, lessons from fairytales, Love Lessons, Uncategorized

Wednesday, March 4, 2015

Must-see: Cinderella movie

I’m such a sucker for Disney movies — remember when I almost cried during UP? Combine that with a fairytale, and, well, I’m practically in love.

The new take on Cinderella looks beautiful. Everything from the scenery down to the costumes looks exquisite, doesn’t it?

The movie opens in theaters on March 13th. Are you excited? xoxo

P.S. Recognize Cinderella? It’s Lily James, who plays Cousin Rose on Downton Abbey!

P.P.S. What’s your favorite fairytale? And, fairytale posters… 🙂

[Photos by Jonathan Olley]

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2 Comments Filed Under: books, Entertainment and Media, fairytales, lessons from fairytales, movies, must-watch, Uncategorized

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So About What I Said is a daily blog that covers relationships, disabilities, lifestyle and pop culture. I love to laugh and have been known to overshare. I also have an unabashed obsession with pop music, polo shirts, and PEZ dispensers. Read more...

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