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Monday, December 21, 2020

My Essay on CNN Opinion: “This New Holiday Movie Would Have Changed Everything For My Teenage Self”

holiday movieSo…did you all watch Lifetime’s new holiday movie “Christmas Ever After” last weekend??

I saw the ad for it a couple months ago and screamed with joy! We are FINALLY getting disability representation in these movies! THIS IS HUGE, especially for rom-coms! I’ve ranted and written about this so much over the years, so to see it actually happening is…WOW.

DOUBLE WOW

TRIPLE WOW

INFINITY WOW

ALL THE WOWS

And, I’m so happy that my last byline of 2020 is from CNN Opinion!! Seeing Ali Stroker starring in this holiday movie rom-com was a big win for disability representation and I was here for it!

Here’s an excerpt of the piece, in which I plead to give disabled people our meet-cutes already…

Indeed, this movie isn’t just groundbreaking because it stars a disabled actress. It’s also groundbreaking because the movie is about love and romance, which is something you don’t see much of when it comes to characters with disabilities. Disabled people are very often viewed as asexual by our culture and this is reflected in the ways we see people with disabilities portrayed in movies and TV.

These views are all too often made through the ableist lens by non-disabled people, leading to inaccurate and sometimes-insulting assumptions about how disabled people actually live. There’s this societal misconception that disabled people don’t or can’t fall in love and have relationships just like non-disabled people. The total absence of social messages when I was growing up that women with disabilities can be sexy constantly left me feeling like romance wasn’t something that could ever happen for me or that there must be something wrong with me.

holiday movieI love rom-coms, but where’s the female disabled lead?

That was the question I asked in one of my very first published pieces this year. I’m so happy that I got to answer that question in my final piece of the year!!

These types of full-circle moments are my absolute favorite

You can read the full piece here and I’d love to hear your thoughts. Feel free to email me anytime at mellow1422@aol.com and let’s chat! And of course, feel free to share my essay on Facebook, Twitter or even your local refrigerator. If you share on Twitter, be sure to tag me @melissablake so I see your tweet and we can connect! I can’t wait to hear from you! Love you all… xoxo

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4 Comments Filed Under: CNN Opinion writing, Dating, Disability

Monday, April 13, 2020

My Essay on CNN Opinion: “The Bachelorette Is Growing Up”

BacheloretteHere’s something I never thought I’d say (err, type): I’m the same age as the next Bachelorette. The same age. We’re both 38. And I’m not speaking in hyperbole when I say that this is groundbreaking.

Looking for some fun distraction reading?? Here’s my latest piece for CNN — my 24th for them!! I wrote about the next Bachelorette Clare Crawley and how seeing a 38-year-old woman on the show is going to be a game-changer!!

A woman in her 30s looking for love is a first for the franchise and Crawley thinks her age will definitely be an asset in her search. Asset, indeed. After 16 seasons of women in their 20s, we’re finally seeing some diversity on The Bachelorette, and it’s such a win for us older Millennials, who enjoy the show, but are in a much different place than we were more than a decade ago. We live in a culture that prioritizes youth and vitality above all else, so when we constantly see young, young, young in everything from TVs to movies to even commercials, we get the message loud and clear: Getting older is the ultimate sin. It means the end.

Here’s an excerpt of the piece, in which I celebrate the wonderful awesomeness of us “cougars”!! We’re a mighty, mighty force, I tell you…

The reality is that women over 30 exist in this world, and they’re living and thriving. So why shouldn’t reality television reflect that? Perhaps Crawley signals a much-needed change for the franchise — one that will be a better reflection of how women date and marry in 2020.

Repeatedly seeing women primarily in their 20s just reinforces all those negative stereotypes about “older” women; society often says that women over 30 are “over the hill” or “past their prime,” or even worse — that those who are older and looking for love are somehow pathetic or desperate. And let’s not forget that little word “cougar,” made famous by Mrs. Robinson in 1967’s “The Graduate.” Spoiler alert: Anne Bancroft, who played Robinson, was only 35.

But how does most of our society view “older” men? Very differently. We use positive terms like “distinguished,” and a man with gray hair is often called a “silver fox.” Men, it seems, gain respect as they age — while women lose respect.

You can read the full piece here and I’d love to hear your thoughts. Feel free to email me anytime at mellow1422@aol.com and let’s chat! And of course, feel free to share my essay on Facebook, Twitter or even your local refrigerator. If you share on Twitter, be sure to tag me @melissablake so I see your tweet and we can connect! I can’t wait to hear from you! Love you all… xoxo

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2 Comments Filed Under: CNN Opinion writing, Love Lessons, TV

Tuesday, January 14, 2020

My Essay on CNN Opinion: “What 61 Million Americans and I…” and Democratic Debates

Democratic debatesBy all accounts, 2019 was the Year of the Democratic Debates. Starting in June, we tuned in for five debates and listened intently as candidates outlined their platforms and plans on everything from immigration reform to gun control to healthcare. Memes even captured the best moments and trending hashtags kept the conversations going on social media.

Yet as historic as these debates were (with a record number of female candidates at the debate podiums, for example), one topic continued to be noticeably absent time and time again: Disability rights and disability inclusion.

This became the basis for my final CNN op-ed in 2019 and it was one I’d been wanting to write for quite awhile. It’s so important that the candidates start talking about their disability platforms and, thankfully, I was so glad to see them discuss disabilities during the December debate.

Here’s an excerpt of the piece, in which I outline exactly why disabled people like myself need to be part of the conversation — on the debate stage & on the campaign trail…

Indeed, people with disabilities are fierce change-makers, which is why it’s essential that they’re included in discussions surrounding the crucial 2020 election and especially included in candidates’ disability platforms. After all, we know what it feels like to be left out when it comes to policy decisions — and even worse, we know what it feels like to be harmed by those policies.

As the saying goes, the personal is political. Who I am as a person and what I’ve been through because of my disability includes politics. For disabled people, it’s impossible to separate the two because what’s happening in Washington is directly affecting our personhood every day.

What I want from Thursday’s Democratic debate is the same thing I want in all the debates and on the campaign trail: I want disabled people to be seen and I want us to be included.*

*It’s also what I want from ALL the Democratic debates…

You can read the full piece here and I’d love to hear your thoughts. Feel free to email me anytime at mellow1422@aol.com and let’s chat! And of course, feel free to share my essay on Facebook, Twitter or even your local refrigerator. If you share on Twitter, be sure to tag me @melissablake so I see your tweet and we can connect! I can’t wait to hear from you! Love you all… xoxo

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Leave a Comment Filed Under: CNN Opinion writing, Disability, Election

Monday, November 11, 2019

My Essay on CNN Opinion: “My Parents Bought Their First Color TV So I Could See Big Bird”

Big Bird Big BirdThis post is brought to you by the number 22 — as in my 22nd CNN op-ed! I’m so honored that I got to write this in celebration of Sesame Street’s 50th anniversary!! I was obsessed with the show as a child and, well, I’m still obsessed, especially with Big Bird, who still don’t look a day over six!! What’s his secret?

This piece has been decades in the making — ever since I was a kid in the ‘80s glued to the TV watching Sesame Street! I’m so honored that I got to write this in celebration of the show’s 50th anniversary!! I’ve been wanting to pitch this idea all year and I was literally counting down the months until November!! I mean, what other children’s show has been on consistently for FIVE DECADES and is still so culturally relevant? Sesame Street has never shied away from tackling the tough topics of the day, whether it’s racism, homelessness or the opioid crisis.

Plus, I think it’s so cool that people my age who grew up watching Sesame Street are now watching the show with their own kids. I loved my writer friend Erin Khar’s quotes and am so grateful that she let me interview her! Follow her on Twitter for a huge dose of inspiration!

Here’s an excerpt of the piece, in which I quote my favorite song in the opening paragraph (and no, it’s not the show’s theme song)…

As a child of the 1980s, I grew up watching — and loving — that group of furry friends. Because of my disability, the show was often my window to many aspects of the world — the perfect way for me to explore and grow beyond the confines of my wheelchair. In fact, I remember my parents buying our first color TV just so I could watch the show in color.

The show’s classic theme song asks this question: “Can you tell me how to get? How to get to Sesame Street?” But perhaps it’s so much more than just a physical place. Sesame Street is love. Sesame Street is treating people with kindness. Sesame Street is friends and family — both the furry and human variety. Sesame Street is creating memories. And, like Big Bird sang, Sesame Street is home. So how exactly do you get there? Maybe all you really need to do is look around. Maybe you’re already there.

Big BirdPlus, I couldn’t let Sesame Street’s 50th anniversary go by without snapping a selfie with the Bert to my Ernie!! We even ended the day by watching some classic clips of our favorite duo!! Happy birthday, Sesame Street! Here’s to many more years of love, laughter and learning with our furry friends, especially Big Bird…

You can read the full piece here and I’d love to hear your thoughts. Feel free to email me anytime at mellow1422@aol.com and let’s chat! And of course, feel free to share my essay on Facebook, Twitter or even your local refrigerator. If you share on Twitter, be sure to tag me @melissablake so I see your tweet and we can connect! I can’t wait to hear from you! Love you all… xoxo

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1 Comment Filed Under: CNN Opinion writing, family, TV

Tuesday, October 8, 2019

My Essay on CNN Opinion: “Bell Bottoms and a Blended Family: ‘The Brady Bunch’ at 50”

Brady Bunch Brady BunchHere’s the story…of that time I got to write about my favorite TV family!! The 50th anniversary of “The Brady Bunch” was last month and I’ve been wanting to write about it for months!! I had such a groovy time reminiscing about how the show has aged and its lasting cultural legacy!! And, I’m so glad that I got to write about the show for CNN Opinion, which, as you know, is my absolute favorite op-ed outlet…

I spent my formative years watching reruns of “The Brady Bunch” on TBS and I quickly fell in love with the show! It was a look back at a different time and, come on, those songs were so catchy, right?? And their dance moves? Flawless!!

Here’s an excerpt of the piece, in which I (finally!) publicly reveal my childhood crush on Greg Brady, who was my Casanova of Clinton Avenue…

For half a century, it’s been hard to escape the show’s influence. We’ve all found ourselves wrapped up in the Brady bubble at some point, even if we didn’t watch during the original run. I was born a full seven years after the show ended, long after the gang hung up their bell bottoms and stopped singing about sunshine days. And still, the show (and most importantly, the Bradys themselves) were such an integral part of my childhood.

In the end, I’m not sure the sort of charm and innocence we see on “The Brady Bunch” can ever be replicated. But maybe that’s a good thing. After all, it’s that very uniqueness that has helped the show remain such a cultural classic for so many years. We can enjoy and appreciate it as a sort of time capsule of the era, revisiting its lessons any time we want.

Yes, the Bradys have given us the ride of a lifetime. Bell bottoms and all.

Brady BunchYou can read the full piece here and I’d love to hear your thoughts. Feel free to email me anytime at mellow1422@aol.com and let’s chat! And of course, feel free to share my essay on Facebook, Twitter or even your local refrigerator. If you share on Twitter, be sure to tag me @melissablake so I see your tweet and we can connect! I can’t wait to hear from you! Love you all… xoxo

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2 Comments Filed Under: CNN Opinion writing, family, TV

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So About What I Said is a daily blog that covers relationships, disabilities, lifestyle and pop culture. I love to laugh and have been known to overshare. I also have an unabashed obsession with pop music, polo shirts, and PEZ dispensers. Read more...

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