My Advice to High School Graduates

advice to high school graduatesListen up, friends!! Can you hear that? It’s a huge, collective cheer from the 18-year-olds all across the country!! They’re jumping for joy and throwing their caps in the air in unison — after all, it’s one euphoric celebration! They’re celebrating newfound independence and plotting their next moves. But even as they explore this burgeoning sense of freedom, there’s still lots to learn in this big world! So, naturally, I thought I’d take it upon myself to educate the masses with some advice to high school graduates!! Recent Grads, here’s what you need to know…

There’s more to life

Yes, believe it or not, life does exist beyond the hallowed halls of high school. I know it doesn’t seem that way when you’re living that day-to-to drama; it’s so easy to just get caught up in it and think it’s the be all and end all. But, I promise…it’s most definitely not. You’re going to go on and live a whole life once you walk out those school doors for the last time, and the last four years will become just another blip on the radar of your life.

Those Mean Girls? They don’t matter

I mean, sure, those girls may be making your life a living hell right now, but do you want to know a little secret? Their power doesn’t extend beyond the “control” they have in high school. And I put quotes around the word control because, really, they have about as much power as you’re willing to give them. Who are they, really? In reality, they’re just insecure bullies who pick on others to feel better about themselves. Don’t let them win. In 10 years, I challenge you to go to your high school reunion and show them just how spectacular you are and how they missed out on getting to know an awesome person!

Don’t take people for granted

As famed high school philosopher Ferris Bueller once said, “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.” Indeed, life moves fast. Excessively fast. Before you know it, years have passed and life has changed. Live fully and love fiercely — and ALWAYS let those closest to you know just how much you love them before it’s too late. I guarantee you that you’ll never regret saying what’s in your heart. So, set those words free already!!!

What advice would you add? When did you graduate high school? Was the “real world” anything like you thought it would be? And, just for fun, what’s your fondest memory of high school? I’d love to hear all about it, friends!! xoxo

The Key to a Happy Relationship: Communication and Roses

happy relationship communication rosesMany may believe that a stunning array of hand-picked roses sent to someone is only good for special occasions such as birthdays or anniversaries. However, a lovely bouquet is also a great way to let someone know you are thinking of them. The following will give some tips on how to maintain a happy and healthy relationship with both family and friends alike. Also highlighted is how a simple yet never-ending sign of affection of a beautiful arrangement of fresh-picked roses can make the biggest statement to those you care about.

Not Just Flowers, an Experience

Flowers are a great gift to give to anyone to let them know you care and you thought of them. One of the most common flowers available are the roses. So many colors make for so many choices in the bouquet that would be perfect for your loved one or friend. If you are looking to take the gift of roses up a notch, you should consider the quality bouquets at Roseshire, where the flowers are put on display from the moment the receiver opens the protective environmental elements resistant packaging.

The finest roses from Southern California go straight from the garden to your doorstep within 24 hours of your order. To further protect the freshness and beauty of the arrangement you have sent, the people at Roseshire carefully place the flowers in a gorgeous custom designed box that accentuates the natural beauty of the flowers. So while you may not get the instant gratification of seeing the roses the moment you open the door, you will have an amazing experience with the decorative box conjoined with the flowers. Personalized greeting cards also are available to let the person know the reason for the gift.

The Key to a Successful Relationship

Too often when it comes to relationships, whether with friends or family, people tend to veer away from the behaviors that brought the relationships together in the first place. It becomes assumed the spark or love will maintain without help from combined effort. Relationships are living, breathing things just like the beautiful flowers you wish to be delivered. Relationships need to be sustained in order to remain alive, vibrant and happy. To maintain this happiness, you must reclaim the communication lines you both once had.

Lapses in or lack of communication is one of the most common reasons why relationships (whether friendly or intimate) go south. If the person you were when you first met your significant other changes over the years, grow and mature with them. Be there for them, whether it is to be a shoulder to cry on, sharing a laugh or simply being an attentive ear to blow off some steam. Take the extra step to do something special and spontaneous to show continued admiration and interest.

Maintaining strong communication between friends and loved ones will keep the relationship going and happy. Most of the time it is as simple as paying attention when the significant other is talking (not just his or her words but the emotion in the words as well) and knowing that no matter what, you will always be there for that person through thick and thin. With strong communication lines comes unbeatable trust, which is an important element in relationship success.

–Sara Stringer is a freelance writer who most enjoys blogging about lifestyle, relationships and life as a woman. In her spare time, she enjoys soaking up the sunshine with her husband and two kids. Consideration was received for the editing and publishing of this article.

[Photo via We Heart It]

Tuesday Tunes: Wilson Phillips’ “Hold On”

Editor’s Note: Song lyrics denoted in bold italics.


Leave it to car rides on a random Tuesday to bring back all the feels of days gone by. Picture this: We piled in the car last week to head a few towns over to get the molds made for my new shoes. I’m watching the world go by in the backseat when I hear the opening hook of one of my favorite ’90s gems. It was cool in that pre-smooth jazz kind of way — you know, the way that all ’90s music sort of resembled elevator music. It was melodic and calming and, well, smooth. Honestly, it almost put me to sleep right there in the car.

Wilson Phillips’ “Hold On”
From Wilson Phillips

I first fell in love with Wilson Phillips way back in the age when cassette tapes were king and radio ruled the airwaves. I couldn’t have been more than 9 or 10, but the band’s words spoke to me in a way that not many songs had up to that point. It suddenly all became clear: I was enraptured.

I know there’s pain
Why do lock yourself up in these chains?
No one can change your life except for you
Don’t ever let anyone step all over you
Just open your heart and your mind
Is it really fair to feel this way inside?

They say we’re our own worst enemies and I couldn’t agree more. It’s so true, you know? We create these barriers around ourselves — maybe they’re realistic, maybe they’re not — and we get to a point where we’re unable to see around these barriers. I’ve seen more of these barriers in my life than I care to admit, but, well, I suppose I just did. I sometimes get so bogged down by external things in life — so much so that I have trouble seeing the bigger picture. I suppose it’s one of those forest for the trees thing. I’m so focused and obsessed with the minute details that I start to feel as though I can’t see straight. I even forget that I’m the only one who has a choice in this situation. Yes, I may not have had any control over what happened to me, but I’m a fool if I think I don’t have every ounce of control over how I react to said situation or what I choose to do next. Whether I immediately see it at first or not, it’s all on me.

Some day somebody’s gonna make you want to
Turn around and say goodbye
Until then baby are you going to let them
Hold you down and make you cry
Don’t you know?
Don’t you know things can change
Things’ll go your way
If you hold on for one more day
Can you hold on for one more day
Things’ll go your way
Hold on for one more day

Bad things happen in life. People can be cruel and mean and just downright evil. We’re not so special that we’re immune to that part of life. That’s just not how things work, I’ve learned. But you know what I’ve also learned? We can also be stronger than we ever thought possible and rise to the occasion even if we’re feeling weak and scared and afraid. We don’t have to allow these people to have any sort of lasting power over us because, let’s be real, that’s exactly what they want — sometimes, they want those around them to feel just as miserable and unhappy as they are. We don’t have to live like that; we can break that destructive cycle. We can be our own champion — was that too much of a cliche? I suppose my point is this: Life can — and will — change. I didn’t always believe that, especially right after my father died. When things get really bad, I tend to get an intense case of tunnel vision and think that things are going to be that way forever and it doesn’t matter what I do to change things. What’s the point, I wonder? It can be hard to “ride the wave” until things turn around, but more often than not, I’ve found it’s incredibly worth it.


I know that there is pain
But you hold on for one more day and
Break free the chains
Yeah I know that there is pain
But you hold on for one more day and you
Break free, break from the chains

So who knows? Had it not been for Wilson Phillips, I might be crying in a corner somewhere bemoaning my existence and thinking nothing can ever, ever change. But we all know that’s not true, right? Life, really, is just one giant roller coaster, full of ups and downs and an amazing number of twists and turns; trust me, I’m never not amazed at those whirly twists and turns. We might not like them, but if we just “hold on” for a little longer, things will change.

Or at the very least, we’ll get to see some new scenery when that roller coaster changes directions. Remember: It’s all about looking on the bright side — and NOT looking down!

Transitions: Are They Our Friend or Our Foe?

It was so nice of Melissa to ask me to guest blog this week. I was thinking about topics to do and the first one I came up with is…drum roll, please…

Transitions.

Some people don’t seem to have any trouble with transitions. They just flit seamlessly from one activity or life stage to another. Me? Not so much!
I got to thinking about this yesterday when Janelle and I were stopping by McDonald’s to get her a decaf and me a lemonade (warning: don’t get in the afternoon beverage habit because it can get pricey!). Anyway, after the cashier gave us our order, I was taken back to my daily morning decaf on the way to work. It was a lovely morning ritual, stopping by McDonald’s and taking my decaf out to the back of the school to drink it as I greeted the students at 7:15 in the morning. I am happy to be on summer vacation, but that smell of the decaf made me long for those fun school days of yore (OK, of just two days ago, but you get my point!). And, it’s not like I retired or something; I’ll be back at it in no time.

So, I started to think about other transitions in my life and realized I have always been this way. Going to college required an entire semester for me to adjust. I shed tears on my wedding day, not just of happiness, but of nostalgia for my old life. As the kids got older, I would fret about what I would do when they got out of this stage or that stage. Nevermind that it always worked out. I just couldn’t help myself and got nostalgic.

So, one topic for me to examine this summer is my newly discovered aversion to transitions. After all, isn’t each ending a new beginning?


Are transitions hard for you? What life transitions do you remember the most? Which ones made the biggest impact on you?

Addictions Aren’t Fixed By Relationships

Drug and alcohol problems permeate all classes, cultures and demographics. America’s largest minority – the disabled – are perhaps at even greater risk of developing addictions than other groups due to a number of factors. For one, many forms of disability, such as blindness and deafness, are not adequately accounted for in the many options for rehab and counseling. Furthermore, many driving forces of addiction stem from issues in which the disabled are especially vulnerable: bullying, loneliness and depression.

Developing a psychological and/or physiological dependence on drugs and/or alcohol affects men more than women. Therefore, it’s no surprise that when addiction exists in relationships involving one or more people living with a disability, it’s almost always the man with the problem. That doesn’t mean the coin doesn’t sometimes flip the other way; it’s simply that one side weighs more than the other.

Sometimes, the most common denominator in the many relationships where a man has an addiction issue is that the drug or alcohol problem existed prior to the start of the relationship. This is not immediately evident to the woman, her friends or her family because the addicted individual is temporarily cured by romance. He is willing to put drugs and alcohol to the side – at least relative to his typical consumption – because feelings of love for another person override the love of a bottle, needle, pill or pipe.

Women, especially those with disabilities, must be particularly careful not to let men use them as a temporary cure for their addictions. Though seemingly benign at the beginning, drug and alcohol problems lead to further issues. For example, dual diagnosis for men can start with addiction and leads to mental health disorders, whereas for women, it’s the other way around. While not every addict eventually becomes bipolar, depressed or OCD, many do. Women who get romantically involved with men suffering from drug and alcohol addictions have to weigh the risks before taking the relationship to the next level.

Men: relationships cannot be used as substitutes or distractions from drug and alcohol addiction. Recognize when chemical dependence exists and take appropriate steps toward fixing the problem without forming a new dependency on somebody rather than something. Seek recovery treatment, counseling and online support.

Let’s say the relationship is already underway. In this case, accept your partner’s help in solving the addiction problem. Do not ever tell a woman she’s wrong for wanting to change you. Do not use her love as a weapon to get what you want – mainly the substances your body and mind crave.

Appreciate that someone is there for you. Honor her commitment by doing your best to beat the drug and alcohol demons once and for all. Keep her happy, and make sure to still find time to ask her about her day. No matter how dramatic of a rehabilitation you’re going through, life goes on in many other ways for those around you. Be mindful of her wants and needs like she is of yours, and not only will addiction be conquered, but loved will grow.

–Sara Stringer is a freelance writer who most enjoys blogging about lifestyle, relationships and life as a woman. In her spare time, she enjoys soaking up the sunshine with her husband and two kids. Consideration was received for the editing and publishing of this article.

[Photo via We Heart It]