Yesterday, I shared my newest piece for Yahoo Life all about this month’s ADA anniversary. This year was a huge milestone — THIRTY YEARS — so I was excited to see all the coverage and disabled stories about where we’ve been, where we are and where we’re going in the next 30 years.
Well, Sunday’s official anniversary came and went. While, yes, there was coverage, one thing stuck out to me: The anniversary didn’t even trend on social media. And for some reason, I’ve been thinking about that a lot these past few days. Not because I’m sad or mad or annoyed, which I am (all three, actually), but because the lack of major recognition is just, well, the status quo when it comes to disabilities.
It’s something that disabled people like myself know all too well. It’s super disappointing that the ADA wasn’t even a blip in the news cycle ON THE ACTUAL ANNIVERSARY. At all. The anniversary of the biggest disability rights legislation and nope…nothing. What kind of inexcusable shenanigans are these??
I mean, this is what disabled people experience every day. This is our life, so I’m not surprised, but I would expect more from 2020.
On a deeper level, this lack of visibility is telling. It’s incredibly symbolic of how disabled people are still treated in 2020. We’re ignored. We’re left out. We’re forgotten about. We’re mocked. We’re undermined. We’re an after-thought.
So…why do I post photos of myself? To normalize disability. Maybe if more people saw disabled people, they would see us as actual human beings. Maybe they wouldn’t mock us with horrible names. Just a thought.
I don’t know who needs to hear this, but…
Disabled bodies are worthy
Disabled bodies are beautiful
Disabled bodies are hot
Disabled bodies are spectacular
Also, we need to start saying that word.
Disabled.
It’s not “differently abled”
It’s not “special needs”
It’s DISABLED.
Why are people so afraid to use that word?? I’ve seen people perform feats of word gymnastics trying to come up with a euphemism when really…
DISABLED IS NOT A BAD WORD
People are shocked when I say I’m PROUD to be disabled because we still live in a society where pride + disability don’t belong in the same sentence.
But I’m here to tell you they do belong together!! That’s why I’m so open about my life with a disability and want the world to see disabilities in a new way. My disability pride has taught me to be more vocal. To speak up. And, yes, to show my face — hi, selfies! Disabled people are here and we’re proud.
I recently asked my mom to take some new photos of me in my wheelchair for Disability Pride Month. Y’all know I haven’t always been comfortable in my body and that’s because I’m not used to seeing people like me, but that’s changing…and I couldn’t be more excited!! Disabled body representation is the future and I’m here for it.
My Essay on Upworthy: “Disability Pride Month…You Should Know…”
Dating With Disabilities: Cosmopolitan’s Hottest Bachelor
My Essay on HuffPost Personal: “Trolls Told Me I’m Too Ugly To Post Pics…”
martha says
Bravo! I hope your word is spread widely and a big hug for all you are doing.
Brenda Robinson says
Congrats at that feeling of acceptance of YOU. I love the idea of disabilty pride. We need to look at what we have in common as a community. It is interesting to watch the Black Pride movement reimagined as Black Lives Matter. Often the lives of people who are disabled have not mattered either. Keep up the good fight.
Krysten Quiles says
Good for you Melissa, this is so important. I always appreciate you sharing your world with us, it helps us to understand. Love you friend!
BG says
Thank you for all that you do to continue to normalize disability and mental illness. Keep up all the hard work, we will continue to support!
Michelle says
You are spectacular! Bravo!
Thank you for all you do!!!
TW says
If 2020 has shown me anything, it’s just how depraved we have become as a society and how effective social media has become at fueling this downward spiral into despair. While I absolutely loath platforms like TikTok, and just about every awful craze & challenge, I have hope that these these networks could eventually become a platform for progress.
That’s what you’re doing, Melissa. You are showing the courage to proudly hold your ground; robbing the trolls & bullies of the desperate gratification that they seek. Your light overpowers their dark shadows of ignorant thoughtlessness
While I am reluctant to believe that the cruel & hurtful trends or pranks will be ending anytime soon, it warms my heart to see such strength prevail. Keep your messages out there and show the world what a true hero looks like. Sharing your experiences with the world add so much weight to the importance of taking a step back and evaluating our contributions to society. Am I adding to it, or taking away? One thing is certain, you’re adding more than most. Keep it up!
Michelle Hey says
Thank you for sharing the story about what’s happening on TIK TOK. Keep spreading your message!!! You are strong, beautiful, and inspiring!!! Unfortunately, Trump has spread a message of hate and divisiveness throughout our world. Ignorant people love that he’s making cruelty increasingly the norm. We must all stay strong to stop this hurtfulness. Sending you and your family love and peace.
Rachel says
I was so impressed to read your response to the TIK TOK prejudice. You should be praised for your hard work in trying educating others who are yet to learn qualities such as respect, compassion and decency. We can only hope that by openly communicating and bravely teaching the way you are, we can educate more people who are ignorant of the repercussions of their cruel and senseless actions. You are truly inspirational and may all we follow your example!