As I’ve been fond of saying lately, “That was a time!” And by that, in this case, I’m referring to just the last 48 hours alone!! But first, hello to new readers of So About What I Said…
It seems one of my tweets has gone VIRAL. We’re talking about the good kind of viral here, not the kind of germs that invade your body and leave you laid up in bed for days or weeks — I should know since I’ve had those sorts of body invaders before and it’s NOT FUN, let me tell you!
Anyway, first, here is the tweet that’s getting quite a bit of attention, in which I say this: “During the last round of trollgate, people said that I should be banned from posting photos of myself because I’m too ugly. So I’d just like to commemorate the occasion with these 3 selfies.”
That tweet stemmed from — you guessed it! — a run-in with some hateful trolls last month. I was pretty shocked and stunned at the time, though I know I shouldn’t be because this is America in 2019. Some conservative YouTuber mentioned my CNN op-ed about why we should all unfollow Trump and I made the mistake of reading the comments. In addition to being a “so-called journalist,” I’m fat, ugly and look like a blob fish, a parade balloon and a potato with a face.
The dig at my journalism credentials doesn’t bother me, but you know what?? I’m getting so tired of people (read: men) thinking it’s OK to insult a woman’s appearance. Yes, my disability makes me look different. Trust me, I know that. I’ve known that my entire life.
And people wonder why I’ve struggled so much with self-acceptance when it comes to how I look and our society’s notion of what “beautiful” is. It’s because of comments like these — comments that dismiss me and deem me unworthy.
This is just one more example of the type of ableism that people with disabilities face every day and it’s something I’m constantly trying to change. It’s the reason I wrote that Glamour essay earlier this year. And it’s the reason I posted those selfies; it was my way of telling the trolls that they’re not going to get the best of me. If they knew anything about me, then they’d know that the second they tell me not to do something is the second I’m going to do exactly that!
But enough about those trolls! I’m so glad that my viral tweet has led you here and I thank you for stopping by! I’m a freelance writer covering relationships, disabilities and pop culture. You can subscribe to my blog if you’re so inclined — sign-up is on the right-hand side! And here’s more about me as well as some of my clips — and, yes, I know my clips section is in woeful need of an update! It’s been on my to-do list forever!
So! Whoa! Wow! Just two days ago, I had 7,500 followers. Now, I’ve got 37,000 and my tweet has been retweeted more than ONE HUNDRED THOUSAND times!!
Thank you again, friends!!!! I’m completely speechless, which is rare for me!! And thank you so much for reading So About What I Said… xoxo
Sunday Column: So You’re The Single Girl From The Cornfields…
Beauty Queen
MEMO TO MEN: In defense of letting your guard down
Julie Torrey says
GOD made you…..You are a strong women….You are smart…..You are successful!…..YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!
Pam says
She shouldn’t pay any attention to the bullys that have no life.
Sarah says
Post away! The more selfies the better. Your strength and spirit bring tears to my eyes, Melissa! You are an amazing person and role model. If I’m reading twitter-speak correctly, more than 200,000 people <3'd your cute selfies. Think of the beautiful self-love you're inspiring people with! Post on!
Stephanie Lee says
I followed you a few years back when I was blogging, but I stopped for awhile. Now, I’m blogging again and here I am! You go girl!! So proud of you and happy for you! 💪🏻💪🏻
Camille DeAngelis says
New follower here! I’m excited to read your work. Lacresha Berry (a wonderful NYC-based playwright, actor, singer/songwriter, and teacher) introduced me to the concept of selfies (and portraiture in general) as a form of political empowerment. (Did you know that Frederick Douglass and Harriet Tubman were the first- and second-most photographed Americans in the 19th century? I didn’t!!) It’s so awesome to see you making yourself visible for the sake of a kinder and healthier culture and community (online and in real life). All the best!!
High Heels says
You Go Girl!!! Do not let anyone Lead or influence your feelings nor your emotions 💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾
PS: I’m among those who started following you today! You’re an INFLUENCER! Don’t forget that!
Mary says
Numbers don’t lie. So greatful for your voice and beautiful writing. . I hope to meet you in person some day and give you a big hug.
Carrie says
Fabulous smile and a fabulous message! In the words of t swift haters gonna hate, shake it off and keep going!
Ardalan says
I cried. You’re beautiful both inside and outside. You are a valuable being and you are proving it.
Sinead says
Hello from Scotland! Twitter can be a crazy place but it’s so lovely when people rally behind and support and champion someone against all the hate. Definitely gives some me faith back in the inherent kindness in people. I’ve loved reading some of your work, look forward to what’s next!
Carol says
I’m new here. But I have to say: You are the cutest! In all possibly aspects! <3
Charlotte says
Hello 👋🏻 Melissa! I’m a new follower (both on Twitter and here on your blog) from Manchester, United Kingdom 🇬🇧
You’re beautiful, talented, funny and so interesting! I’ve really enjoyed reading your blog so far!
Tatiana says
It’s more important how kind are you and what kind of person rather how you look. Because I would prefer to be friends with you, then thousands of other people with ugly minds and hearts! Please! Please! Don’t let them get you down! Post pictures of you and selfis constantly. And if someone does not like it- well that’s their problem! You are amazing!
Lori says
Hi Melissa! Just wanted to add my support. I’ve been reading your work forever and have always thought your writing brings a lot of beauty into the world. And whoever creates beauty is in turn beautiful herself. So glad you’re not silencing your voice because of these small men and their small……minds.
gigi mcdonagh says
Hi Melissa. I read about you on Bored Panda and have been thinking of you ever since. I wanted to find a way to send you a message as I am not on social media. It really upset me to read you have been getting abuse. I have been bullied for not being attractive and it really is hurtful. I am so sorry you got such cruel messages. I think you are so brave to stay online and not let the bullies win. You are pretty. You have a beautiful smile and I hope you continue to stay online. Take care.
Susan Izeman says
Thank you thank you thank you! You are showing smarts, grace, and humor – and I’m grinning ear-to-ear!
Oli says
People young and old that spew out such words are not happy with themselves and hoping to find somebody to release their inner rage. Hopefully soon they will realize the immaturity that has riddled their bodies to become loving to themselves as well as to others!
Eveline Verhelst says
All I can say is:respect!!!Keep the good works up and just go on.You are great!Love from Belgium!
Alessandra says
I didn’t know you before yesterday but all the hate that you received from those haters transformed itself in happiness and good news! You got a new subscriber and a new follower on ig and Twitter! Keep working💯
Morgan says
Melissa you are beautiful inside and out!! Keep posting those selfies!!
Lou says
Hey Melissa,
Also new here and from England. I’ve just heard about the crap you had to take the other day. Sadly there’s some people who get off on this kind of thing. They’re not worth an ounce of your emotions!
From what I’ve seen and read so far, you’re beautiful, funny and intelligent!
I’m also disabled and can relate to some of what you have posted.
Stay strong girl and ignore the vitriol ❤️❤️
Emily says
This has been so exciting to watch! You go girl!
Fallon says
You are absolutely gorgeous Melissa!! So strong and such a fighter, and incredibly beautiful. Literally read your story, and just had to come read your other blog posts! They’re amazing!!
Lennie Chua says
Thanks for inspiring me Melissa! Keep rocking on!
https://lenniechua.com/2019/09/14/too-ugly-for-selfies/
Oli says
People young and old that spew out such words are not happy with themselves and hoping to find somebody to release their inner rage. Hopefully soon they will realize the immaturity that has riddled their bodies to become loving to themselves as well as to others!