Dear Mr. Melissa Blake:
Well, OK, Sweet Pea, we both know that you don’t have to say it. I know it’s been awhile since I last wrote, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t been thinking about you — that sounds a bit creepy, doesn’t it?
Speaking of creepy, I discovered a portrait of myself from 2009 while I was doing some cleaning over the weekend. The source? Some of my old writing, and it’s sort of scary just how accurate it is. It captures everything so perfectly, and it looks like I called the Great Feminist Debate long before it was even officially a thing. My unfiltered thoughts as a 28-year-old woman on the verge…
This whole new side of me? I’m not sure it’s a side I like. It’s bold. It’s an “I-don’t-care-about-the-consequences” side. When did I become that girl? I’m cautious. I’m a good girl. I most definitely always follow the rules. And yet, here I am. What sort of woman calls herself an independent feminist and mentally analyzes everything? There’s this huge disconnect going on here. Maybe I just like the idea of being with someone who makes me feel happy again, who makes me laugh and who lets me just let go for once and not think everything to death. Is that such a bad thing?
And right now as I’m typing this, Carly Rae Jepsen’s “Wrong Feels So Right” comes on. Fate, Sweet Pea, or are you trying to send me a message from the future? Nonetheless, even though five years have passed, I’m still fascinated by the whole idea of caution vs. risk-taking when it comes to love. When should we go with our gut, even when our head is screaming at us not to? Can anything good ever come from those types of situations? Can we learn from those situations if we never even take the chance in the first place?
It’s a lot to think about, and I’m pretty sure I’ll be talking your ear off on this very subject years from now. Who knows, maybe you turn out to be that chance I wasn’t sure if I should take. Are you? Or maybe I’m the chance you weren’t sure about at first? It’s all a very romantic notion, isn’t it? Until we meet… xoxo
[Photos via We Heart It]