TO: Men all over the planet
RE: Going gaga over a guitar
DATE: May 14, 2013
Heads-up, boys: I knew there was a reason behind my longstanding love-hate-turned-mostly-hate relationship with a certain Mr. John Mayer — why I wanted to simultaneously call him out for being a faux hipster loser and kiss those faux hipster’s lips while we walk down a quiet city street, getting lost in nothing but each other and feeling like we could take on the world with just our love…
Damn, there I go again. Do you see the power this guy has over me, boys? And, well, if I’m being completely honest here, it’s not just John Mayer who has the power to reduce me to a romantic puddle of love. It’s all John Mayers (read: any guy with a guitar slung over his shoulder and the ability to woo me with words in the form of love songs). After all, remember Facebook Flirt? I didn’t think.
So yes, I’ve got a bad track record when it comes to those musical men. Apparently, I just can’t resist their alluring charm. BUT! Guess what? None of this is technically my fault. And even better? Science is here to back me up! A recent French study revealed the hypnotic effects of the instrument…
One sunny Saturday afternoon, in the shopping district of a medium-sized French city, this good-looking guy approached 300 young women (aged approximately 18 to 22). He introduced himself, declared “I think you’re really pretty,” and asked for her phone number so they could arrange to have a drink. For one-third of these brief encounters, he was carrying what was clearly a guitar case. For another third, he was holding a sports bag; for the final third, he was empty-handed. The implication that he was a musician dramatically increased the actor’s appeal. When he was carrying the guitar case, 31 percent of the women gave him their number. This compares with nine percent when he was carrying the sports bag, and 14 percent when he was carrying nothing.
The conclusions? Musical aptitude is a sign of male fertility, since testosterone fosters the growth of the right hemisphere. Who knew the guitar could make a better wing man than, well, an actual man?
But, this does raise some questions, like “how would women musicians be viewed?” And, “would other instruments work the same way?” For example, I’m not so sure I’d find a guy playing a tuba nearly as sexy as Keith Urban. And an accordion-playing Casanova? Yeah, I’m pretty sure my knees wouldn’t be buckling. At all. Now the bagpipes… xoxo