How did you parents teach you about food? My sister struggled with an eating disorder growing up, and I’ve always been fascinated by how children’s early experiences with food shape the way they view it for the rest of their lives. My parents were pretty neutral when it came to talking about food, but it seems like kids can internalize anything and everything, from a loaded word to using weight as a determination of self-worth to even a seemingly harmless comment such as, “I feel so fat today.”
I’ll be the first to admit that I’ve never been immune to the fat trap. I’ve had my fair share of body-image issues over the years (like my ugly duckling days…), and I can’t help but feel like all those experiences and times of self-doubt have given me such a unique perspective. It’s sort of armed me with a play book for raising my own children some day.
And then I read Carrie Goldman’s post on how she’s raising her three daughters to have a healthy relationship with their bodies and with food. She writes…“And so, from the start, my husband and I have promoted the idea to our girls that it is healthy and necessary for children to grow and gain weight. At this point in their lives, our girls view stepping on the scale as a chance to see how much they have grown, not as a grim moment of judgment about their self-worth. People come in extra small, small, medium, large and extra large. This is a fact. Let’s not muddy it with opinions. Just accept it and get to know the soul living inside the body.”
Goldman and her husband have even taken steps to promote healthy associations with food, opting to talk about food in terms of energy instead of calories. How refreshing is that? It gives me hope for the next generation of young girls.
How was food viewed in your home when you were growing up? In a positive way or something to be feared? How will you raise your children to view food? xoxo
P.S. Goldman’s wisdom on aging: “Bodies change. It is proof of life, of flux, of the waxing and waning of our cells. It is okay for the body to soften, for the skin to slacken. It is the beauty in us that allows us to change.”
[Photos by Amy McMullen]
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Stephanie says
Food was always a very positive thing for us growing up. My dad is a high school health and nutrition teacher, and we always knew what was healthy and what was not. We were taught not to overeat, and we knew that sweets and junk food should be eaten sparingly. We had a garden, we ate lots of veggies but we weren't forbidden from eating anything. I think it was a great way to grow up. We're trying to raise our daughter the same way.
Also, my dad was very careful to promote healthy body image for my sister and I especially. He teaches a whole unit on eating disorders, so we knew very early on the dangers of improperly eating or dieting. He's a pretty great dad! : )
Leeann @ Join the Gossip says
My family eats horribly! My mom always has bought junk food and we played lots of sports growing up so it was common to eat fast food. That was fine growing up because we were so active that we were in shape and thin. As I get older it's a big issue because I'm so used to eating what I want and my body does not allow it anymore lol. I'm trying to change the habits but it's hard!
Anonymous says
I don't know if she mentions this in her book, but another way that we can put an end to the stigma about health and weight is to not disclose a baby's weight as part of their birth announcement. Yes, at one time people wanted to know that information because they saw it as a sign of robust health, especially for boys, but now babies come in all shapes and sizes and low birth weight doesn't mean that a baby is necessarily sick or not thriving, or that their birth weight can't be properly dealt with with suitable neo-natal care. I think that a baby's birth weight should be something that is between the doctors and the family and not announced publicly because it can cause people to make an unfair judgement about the baby's health.
Dancing Branflake says
Food was good. We ate well and healthy. But… eating… at least my eating… well, that was an entirely different story.
Charlotte says
To be honest I don't completely remember my early relationship with food, but I know that from an age I can remember we were always just fed what my parents wanted to serve.. whether it was something simple like fish fingers and chips or something a bit bigger like a full roast dinner. We (me and my brother) were raised to eat what we liked the taste of, but to also sometimes eat what we don't like because it was good for us
Weight was never discussed in our house, or fat content, or calories, or anything negative toward food. The only negative thing I remember being said is that too much sugar is bad for our teeth. So I'd say we were raised to have a very healthy relationship with what we eat. Even now I eat whatever I want to eat and have never, ever dieted or checked how many calories are in something. To me food is there to be enjoyed, and if I ever gain a bit of weight I either do more exercise or just eat smaller portions of what I want to eat!
Sorry for the huge comment, but I think there are far too many negative messages around food these days!
Dahlia Malloy says
This would be a perfect question to ask my brothers. My oldest brother played college football. He was always big. Like the quarterback of the Steelers, he was big. The coaches always tried to make him play a lineman but he could throw really far. He ended up going to a different middle school and high school where they let him play quarterback. My younger brother was also big growing up. But now he eats very little. And what he eats is usually chicken and vegetables. He also does a lot of sit ups. He says it's worth it to have six pack abs. He said the real secret is not the working out. It's the dieting. I admit I would hardly eat while I was dating. It was important to my future husband that I be tiny. I also didn't eat much while I was married. He used to have one of those No Fat Chicks tshirts like Eddie Van Halen. Now that I'm single I am putting on weight. It's not that I don't want to be thin anymore. It's just that I can't move around like I used to before the accident.
Mo says
This is really interesting and some great pieces of advice here. I don't know exactly what my parents thought me about food, but I just know my mom didn't like food going to waste, and now I HATE wasting food. I scold my friends for throwing out half of a burger when we go eat, or saying they are full when only a quarter of their plate is empty. I just honestly think about the energy and time it took for someone to grow the plants, veggies, or butcher the meat, what have you. I then also think about the person that slaved in the kitchen preparing it, so I just get all upset, lol. I know it sounds crazy but when you put into perspective the fact that even here in the States, 1 in 8 people face hunger, and then in 3rd world countries…sheesh; we would really start valuing our meals more.
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