TO: Men all over the planet
RE: Inside the dating world
DATE: August 28, 2012
My dating card may be admittedly blank, boys, but I do know one thing: Dating is a lot like going to the grocery store. If you have no idea what you want — or need — going in, you’re going to be easily overwhelmed. The frozen foods. The produce. The aisles and aisles of cereals. Before you know it, your head will be spinning, and you’ll end up fleeing the store empty handed — and possibly screaming.
Well, the way I see it, dating works the same way. It’s deceptively simple at first. After all, you’re just going out with someone, right? What’s the harm in that? What could possibly go wrong? Everything, really, if you go into said date without your trusty grocery list. But instead of the list being peppered with the likes of onions and strawberries and bread and pickles and coffee, your dating list isn’t so much a list as it is a reminder. It’s a reminder of your answer to one simple question…
What type of dating am I looking for?
Because when you think about it, there really are different types of dating, aren’t there? And, I suppose, you’d have to match your attitude and expectations according to the type of date. So, boys, here’s how I have it all figured out in my head. There are 3 levels of dating…
Dating to get your feet wet
Akin to casual dating, I suppose. Maybe you want to get to know someone without all that pressure, or maybe you’re hoping a friendship will develop even if no romantic sparks fly.
Dating to find a boyfriend
Maybe the relationship won’t last forever, but it will certainly last longer than that getting-your-feet-wet relationship did. You are looking for something deeper, whether you’re together for 6 months or 6 years.
Dating to find a husband
I can guarantee you, boys, that this stage will be the most important one for me. There’s going to come a time when casual dating just gets, well, too casual for me. Right now is going to become far too temporary, and instead of looking for someone I can enjoy a great burger with (the get-your-feet-wet guy…) or someone who brings me chicken soup when I’m sick (the boyfriend…), I’m going to be looking into the future. Who can I see myself spending the rest of my life with? Who is the guy that I’m going to be able to rely on through thick and thin? Those are the sorts of questions I’m going to be asking myself.
Does this make sense, boys? When all is said and done, not all dating is considered equal. In fact, maybe even no two dates are ever quite the same. Because dating to find a boyfriend is different than dating to find a husband; they are two totally different things. But you know what I just realized? I’m probably going to learn a heck of a lot in each stage. Are you excited, boys…? xoxo
[Photos via We Heart It]