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Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Tales From The Trenches: Tale #45

You asked, and our resident guyspert Kasey was more than happy to answer! Feel free to keep those questions coming, friends, and I hope you enjoy today’s male perspective! xoxo
Why do guys have trouble calling girls for the first time?
Well, the short answer is: They’re nervous. And probably insecure about themselves. If a guy is insecure, he will have low confidence levels, and when he sees a cute girl, it is mortifying to call. Fear of rejection is a huge thing, too. But rejection isn’t so bad once you get used to it. I would tell all guys that they NEED to call the girl, too, and not just text them. It opens up communication in a much more emotionally charged medium, and then the girl can actually hear the tonality in your voice. I think you’d give a guy a chance (assuming you gave him your number in the first place) if he sounded super nervous, right?

What is your biggest complaint when it comes to dating?
My biggest complaint is that there aren’t enough places where it is socially acceptable to meet people. When I say that, I’m referring to group gatherings. I mean, you can meet people at a bar (not really my style), you can meet people at friend’s parties, maybe work, but that’s tricky. So what does that leave? The grocery store? I mean, I suppose I can talk to her about fruit in the produce section, but that seems to be crossing the creeper line. And though the online thing works for some, that’s not really my taste. That is my biggest complaint.
How can we stretch out of our comfort zones?
I think the best way to get yourself out of your comfort zone is to go meet a new person. Seriously. Just pick a person you think looks cool, and just say, “Hey, my name is … , and I think your shoes are cool.” Or whatever. Just go talk to a person you have never talked to before. Even if it’s your Starbucks barista. Baristas are people, too.

[Photos via a beautiful world]

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6 Comments Filed Under: Dating, Mind of a Man, Tales From The Trenches, Uncategorized


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Comments

  1. Krissa says

    Tuesday, July 27, 2010 at 1:07 pm

    This is probably my favorite segment. (thank you Kasey)… because i am a single girl…trying to understand these boys…haha…thanks for your response to my question… i figured it was tough to call a girl…i would be nervous if i had to do it… i wish i knew what i could do to make it easier for the guy to call… not sure there is anything other than just being patient and hope he comes around???… haha

    THANKS again!

    Reply
  2. Blythe Hopes Vintage says

    Tuesday, July 27, 2010 at 1:24 pm

    Oh boys. It's all a bit silly really – what's the worst that can happen f you call? They say um, no thank you and hang up. It's not the end of the world, and if they don't want to talk, do you actually want to go out with them anyway?

    If they think you're a weirdo for striking up a conversation over melons, is that your kind of person?

    Either they like you or they don't – it's not a good/bad thing, just a people thing. And you don't want to go out with someone who doesn't like you anyway.

    Reply
  3. RedHead says

    Tuesday, July 27, 2010 at 2:43 pm

    I think you have read some of my posts but recently, a guy gave me his number. Which was all fine and dandy but all we did was text! So finally (after a few alcoholic drinks!) I called him. And it was completely awkward!! Needless to say, texting was a better relationship for us than actually hearing each others voices! Weird, huh??!!

    Reply
  4. Kris says

    Tuesday, July 27, 2010 at 3:47 pm

    Love these…

    I have some earrings up for grabs on my blog. Check it out!

    http://tinyurl.com/2vollfw

    Reply
  5. Bibi says

    Tuesday, July 27, 2010 at 6:26 pm

    I totally agree with Kasey's biggest complaint. I have such a hard time meeting new guys outside of the bar scene and I've done online dating, but I kind of wish there were more organic ways of meeting guys. Ah, well. Back to the produce section it is.

    Reply
  6. Dino says

    Wednesday, July 28, 2010 at 10:15 am

    I have read by chance this interesting post…very beautiful.

    They would really be interested also the boys, but in the comments I see you only girls…and you don't do "compliments".

    Melissa….the last time I approached a girl with the words "sweet", I have received its purse on my head.

    Reply

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So About What I Said is a daily blog that covers relationships, disabilities, lifestyle and pop culture. I love to laugh and have been known to overshare. I also have an unabashed obsession with pop music, polo shirts, and PEZ dispensers. Read more...

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