Dear John (*cue sappy music):
It is with a great sadness and a heavy heart that I write this letter to you. Do you remember the days when we used to run through the halls of our high school? Or how about when you told me my body was a wonderland and that you’d never let my head hit the bed without your hand behind it? And when you told my father that he should be good to me because I’ll be a mother someday? Well, you just made me fall in love with you, didn’t you? It was almost as if I couldn’t help; your charm and alluring mystique were simply too powerful to resist.
My gosh, it seems like it was just yesterday, doesn’t it? But, sadly, those happy days are gone. I’ve been given a hard lesson in battle studies, and I’m sorry, but I just don’t see us having a future together. It was fun while it lasted, but as all good love affairs go, some eventually have to come to an end. 
I won’t lie and pretend it was me so your ego won’t be bruised. The truth is, well, it’s not me…it’s you. Or, rather, it’s some interesting revelations you shared in a recent cover story for Rolling Stone.
“All I want to do now is f–k the girls I’ve already f–ked, because I can’t fathom explaining myself to somebody who can’t believe I’d be interested in them, and they’re going, ‘But you’re John Mayer!’ So I’m going backwards to move forward. I’m too freaked out to meet anybody else.”
Wow. Talk about a less-than-tasteful mouthful of a revelation, huh? And here I thought I was the all-too-honest, over-sharer.
We’re done. That’s fine by me. But what’s this I hear? You’re friends with Taylor Swift? Is that what you young people call it in Hollywood these days? 
I actually feel more sorry for you. Taylor’s got a good head on her shoulders. She doesn’t pull any punches. That girl can take care of herself. If you break her heart – which you probably will (have you ever seen a therapist for your commitment problens?)– I can guarantee that you will be forever immortalized and mortified in one of her songs.
You’ve already broken enough hearts here, John. Please don’t go and break Taylor’s too. She’s too sweet of a girl for that.
un-xoxo
P.S. You know, we’re a lot alike. My disability seems to make it impossible for other people to believe I’d actually be interested in them. Your rockstar status must be that burden for you. So in a weird, twisted way, I suppose I get it. Really, I do.
[Photos via Rolling Stone]
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Faux Trixie says
Actually, I read that whole article, and it made me like John Mayer even more. It talks about how he's not really the guy behind the sappy music. He's an artist who is self-sabotaging, in that the stuff he writes/sings isn't really him. If you ever listen to the John Mayer Trio or have seen him in TV clips, shows, etc., he's a lot different than his music.
The article also talks a lot about his family problems, his anxiety, etc. You only shared a very small part of that entire article, when, if you look at the article as a whole, I think it made him a much more down to earth guy.
I walked away liking him more because it showed him as a deeper person than just some cute guy who writes ballady guitar songs. I would give out a link to the whole article instead of just providing two sentences from a four or five page interview.
The article about Omar Bin Laden was also very good.
Blondie says
Why do famous people always think that they have to appear edgy and cool by saying shocking things and repeatedly using the F word? I did like him, but find what he said to be a little less than classy. Kori xoxo
Elizabeth Marie says
I actually like him more after reading the article, as well. He's brutally honest, the good bad and the ugly-he's a real guy, with real struggles who doesn't want to be immortalized for writing songs about how our bodies are wonderlands.
theKcloset says
Great post Mel! I am still undecided if I am a personal fan of John Mayer, I love his music but I think I could live without his personality.
Happy Monday xo
The Less Than Domestic Goddess says
Interesting post! I have always been a fan of John Mayer. I love his music. I haven't read the article you are quoting, but I'm not surprised given some of the things he's said in the past. He's an introspective guy, and I like that. That quote doesn't paint him in such a great light though. I'm off to read the article!
Melanie's Randomness says
He needs to really grow up!! His quote is ridicolous.
Melissa Blake says
so true, melanie!
septembermom says
I love John's music, but I wonder about his "human relationship skills".
.:*aMbAr*:. says
Yeaam Taylor's also like 12 yrs younger.
Happenstance says
Way to tell him! I didn't read the article but your post was enough:)
The Less Than Domestic Goddess says
Ummm, I just read a recent interview Mayer did with Playboy, and I change my diplomatic previous response. I agree with you, he's gone too far. What a jerk. Just had to come back and comment again on your post, because it's the first thing I thought of when I read the interview.
Dillan m. says
This article is bullshit. Hes afraid to meet new people because he's so famous girls are so wrapped up in that you are personally offended because this knocks you out of the opporotunity to fuck him you are dumb you have no respect for human emotion.
Crystal Kearney says
John Mayer is just creepy. I think he had appeal but now he's just eww.