Yes, my friends, these phrases actually came straight out of my mouth. And before you ask, I was completely sober and hadn’t even had my nightly dose of Klonopin yet. This is me, whether it’s good or bad, in the flesh (well, not really in the flesh, because you know I’m a prude and not prone to exposing skin of any sort…).
A Chiquita banana sticker once spoke to me when it said, “100 percent perfection.”
Love is like a romantic comedy: Sometimes romantic, almost always hilarious and always way too short. Hugh Grant not included.
I’m the girl who ideally tries to be the subtle flirt, but in reality, is the most obvious dork in the world, possibly the entire universe.
My idea of a romantic dream is slow dancing in the pouring rain at midnight in the middle of a deserted street [now mind you that I can’t dance and I am usually sound asleep by 9 p.m. Every night].
Oh, shoot [used on a variety of ocassions, from running into our hallway wall with my wheelchair to getting ink all over my heads from a pesky pen].
She’s [my wonderful sister] also characterized me as a combination of Norma Desmond and ALF. I’ve decided to take BOTH as a compliment.
My Gosh. I am so shameless when it comes to self-promotion.
Go ahead and laugh…it’s OK. Or better yet, hit me with your best shot of some of your own favorite quotes that only you said!
[Photo via Yellow Goat Design]