Dear Mr. Melissa Blake:
Photo courtesy of Le Love
You probably know by now that I’m a pretty independent gal. I don’t need anyone “taking care” of me, holding my hand or otherwise treating me like I’m some weak, fragile doll. But last week? My heart just really, really wished you could have been here. It’s been one tough week. Yes, I know I have lovely family and friends, but it’s just not the same, you know? It’s one thing to gave the support of your family, but it would have been nice to just be able to crash into your arms this last week. I know it probably sounds extremely pathetic, but my my wheelchair breaking just really set me off. Why? Because it was just another reminder that my dad is not here, and there is nothing I can do about it. Did I ever tell you that he could fix anything? He used to fix all my wheelchairs, and dammit, it just makes me mad. He should be here. He should be with his family. Honestly, I don’t think people even realize how much it gets to me. Sometimes I feel like everyone has “moved on” and I’m still treading water – over and over and over and over.
That’s why it just would have been nice to have you here. To hold my hand. To tell me that everything is going to be alright because, frankly, sometimes it just doesn’t feel like anything is ever going to be the same. Even just to make me laugh, which I’m sure you already do on a daily basis.
And before you get all Freudian on me, Mister, let’s just say that this has nothing to do with me using you in an attempt to replace my father. I’m not the sort of girl who has daddy issue, thank you. God help us all if you’re a psychologist; I don’t really buy into that mumbo jumbo. You got that? Stop rolling your eyes. This is NOT me getting all defensive because you hit some precious nerve or something.
Just calm me down and give me a hug, OK?